'Cause You're Gonna Love Me Anyway!

I have a memory etched in my mind of the most profound statement that fell out of my youngest son's mouth when he was 13 years old when I picked him up at school. Let me preface this with saying that he would typically get in the car in a good mood and share stories about his day at school. However, there was one day when I picked him up and he jumped in the car and started talking to me in an unpleasant tone. I said, "Why are you talking to me like that?" His reply was, "'˜Cause you're gonna love me anyway!"

I was taken aback by the inherent power of that one statement and it left me initially speechless, as I processed the profoundly insightful words. I could feel my initial feeling of frustration beginning to turn into a gentle smile in my heart and soul. That one simple sentence was power packed with the true meaning of the root of unconditional, unwavering love. Of course, he was right and I am so glad that he was so aware of the steadiness of my love for him. It will never waver no matter what -- in that he can trust.

In a similar instance, the son of a friend of mine arrived home one day from school in an irritable mood. When his mom asked him why he was acting like that, he profoundly said, "I've used up all my good!" Proof, once again, about the philosophy of the innate security and steadiness of knowing that he was going to be loved any way.

My father was a pathologist and worked in a hospital lab. When I was in high school, he hired me one summer to throw away the specimens that he had already examined. They were stored in jars that were filled with smelly formaldehyde. It seemed that the worst part of the job would be the odor, but I knew that I would be willing to take it on because he was going to pay me an amazing 75 cents an hour! That sounded like a huge income to me at the time and worth the yucky fumes. However, there was one stipulation which meant that I would need to focus. He told me that I was to never throw away a sample that was dated after 1973.

One fateful day, however, I accidentally threw away a 1974! Oh my! Logically, I knew that he would love me anyway. I was concerned that I had fallen down on the job caused by not paying attention to detail. I knew that I was going to have to tell him the truth. Soooo -- ..that night I got up my courage and the truth spilled forth, as I cried pitiful tears. My father hugged me and said, "I love you. Don't worry about it. I was just trying to teach you how to pay attention when you're working so that it would benefit you for later jobs!"

Whew! What a relief, I thought. And I loved him, too!...unconditionally, I might add.
My oldest son had a love for street layouts, signs, maps and exploring. It makes sense to me now because his profession is working as a civil engineer. I have a sweet memory etched in my mind of what he would say every single day when I picked him up at elementary school. He would jump in the car and say, "Let's go explore!" He loved to ride through neighborhoods and drink in all the aspects of directions and where it would lead us. Our paths varied daily. We explored and enjoyed each other's company on these fun daily expeditions. It was all worth the gas and effort for the pleasant remembrances that are stashed away in my memory bank of those after school days. I'm glad that he knew that my love for him was solid enough that I would put all of the daily "to do" lists from life aside, so that I could take him "exploring."

So... let's wrap all this up by succinctly saying that the essence of it all is that, "As our children EXPLORE through life with its many twists and turns and unintentional faux pas and goof-ups, that we, as parents, are going to LOVE THEM ANYWAY even if they have days when they have USED UP ALL THEIR GOOD!" That is the true beauty of UNCONDITIONAL LOVE!!