CBS Fall Movie Preview

Every year, we are force-fed dozens of new television shows on each major network which said network hopes will garner the attention of those with the Nielsen box. Ignoring people who tape shows, or use TIVO, or watch said show online is the way they do it and it constantly affects the way we watch television.

Unfortunately, this has turned nightly television into a pile of crap filled with cop shows, hospital shows and reality television. Every year however, there are some promising new shows that catch people's attention. Unfortunately, these people do not have TIVO or watch television online and these shows are cancelled.

What follows is an analysis of the seasons new shows, and the changes applying to the old shows for the CBS network

MONDAYS

8PM: How I met your mother (Premieres September 24^th): Nothing is changing about this returning show, although CBS Monday has now become the Comedy night for television finally replacing NBC's multi year Comedy Thursday winners.

830PM: The Big Bang Theory (Premiers September 24^th): A show about a hot girl who moves in next door to a bunch of nerds. It looks like it could be decent and it stars Johnny Galecki (The boyfriend in Roseanne), Jim Parsons (has been in a few low budget movies and was in Judging Amy for a few episodes), and Kaley Cuoco (Gorgeous woman who has been in a few episodes of multiple television shows.

9PM: Two and a half Men: This has the same premiere date as the previous two shows and the following one. A hilarious comedy about Charlie Sheen helping his brother and nephew by providing them a house.

930PM: Rules of Engagement: This is last years number one comedy, and ends a night of what looks to be tremendous comedy. My only concern is that Fox's two hours of Prison Break/K-Ville/24 will overwhelm these comedy shows.

10PM: CSI Miami: Honestly, it boggles my mind that this show is still on. David Caruso is an absolutely atrocious Chuck Norris level actor and it's irritating that I can watch this, one of the other two CSI's, NCIS, Cold Case, or Without a Trace and get pretty much the same experience out of them.

TUESDAYS

8pm: NCIS: The Navy version of CSI. There are no new changes on this show for the fall season, and it's still about Mark Harmon trying to solve military crimes.

9pm: The Unit: This is a show starting President Palmer from 24 and the T-1000 from Terminator running around in the United States Special Forces doing undercover/illegal things for their country.. Unfortunately when Dennis Haysbert left 24 for this show, 24 went downhill quickly.

10PM: Cane: Jimmy Smits plays a pseudo-mob boss of a sugarcane/rum empire. His bitter adversaries offer him deals and his two sons fight for the most influence over their dad to do what they want. Yes, I agree with you...this sounds like the Sopranos on network televisions

WEDNESDAY

8PM: Kid Nation: I suppose I should be happy that I went three days into the week without a single reality show until I came to this. The idea is that they're exploiting kids who should still be living with their parents with the hopes that they'll eventually start to cry and give up. This is the worst show currently on television and I fully expect them to follow it up with live executions.

9: Criminal Minds: A brilliant show about FBI profilers, its main star Mandy Patinkin decided he was going to leave the show over the summer, and now Joe Mantegna has been chosen to take his place.

10: CSI New York: Gary Sinise is one of the best actors currently alive today, but he can't seem to catch a break. Even this show, which is pretty good, doesn't get the attention it deserves

THURSDAY

8: SURVIVOR: CHINA: Personally, knowing that CBS paid off China to allow us to film there annoys me because I don't believe we should be giving any money to that evil regime. However, it intrigues me to see how they're going to make a show based in China even remotely survivorish

9: CSI: This show was amazing when it started, and still has an amazing cast, but since they stopped focusing one case, added more cast members, and split everything into two cases, I've lost interest in the show as I don't really care about two forensics teams competing for cases.

10: Without a Trace: It is the CSI for Missing Persons, once again, with a great television cast (Mostly because it's all relatively famous movie actors)

Friday

8: Ghost Whisperer: Jennifer Love Hewitt plays a girl who sees dead people. The girl belongs on stupid coming of age romantic comedies where she can showcase her breasts, not a show which actually requires her to act.

9: Moonlight: Have you ever seen Angel? Or seen the character on Buffy? This is the same thing. A vampire with a soul fights crime and falls in love with a human. I have low expectations for this show, but I love vampires so I'm going to give this a shot. This show will get cancelled midseason, and reruns of one of the CSIs will appear.

10: Numbers: I saw this show for the first time last years and I was completely surprised as to how intriguing a show about mathematicians solving crimes could be. I'm so glad this got renewed, and even gladder that Peter Mcnichols is back from being on 24 to grace us with his presence on this show.

New Shows Predictions: Kid Nation won't do well, Moonlight won't last 10 episodes, Cane is going to grab all the Sopranos nostalgia viewers and last for a long time, and the Big Bang Theory will last even if it's a weak show strictly because of what surrounds it.