Celebrating Valentine's Day for Single People

Roses are Red.
Sugar is Sweet.
You get what you want.
When you buy your own treats!!!

Of course this is mainly for my female sister's in singledom. But my single brethen should feel free to use this list as well.

First of all, I love anything that promotes chocolate. I try not to over indulge often, but this is the one day I will have chocolate at every meal. Oh yes! Valentines day and it's promotion of chocolate gives me carte blanche to over indulge - - THIS ONE DAY.
Now, if you're feeling left out of this seemingly "couples only" celebratory season. Fear not. I've been single for a long time and concluded a while ago - - If I don't spoil me, who will? So here's what you need to do to make this season of love one you'll enjoy and want to celebrate every year forward.

First

GET OVER IT ALREADY!!!! So what! You're alone. Unless you have a twin, you came into the world alone and (unless there's a massive natural disaster or a crazed sniper factors in to your life's equation) you will leave this world alone. Celebrate YOU. If you want flowers, chocolate and candle light on February 14th; I would suggest you get a See's Candy catalog (my favorite); stop by a flower shop (WalMart if you're on a strict budget); and then Yankee Candles for the ultimate candle experience.

Now what?

Second

If you're going to celebrate this day and make it special for you, please do it right. Plan to spend a portion of the day at a Day Spa. If you ain't go nobody then having a total stranger rub out the tension of loneliness will be your second best bet.

I'm certain your town has many day spa's to chose from. If you have never been to a spa, this will really be a treat. But, start slow. A 30 minute massage and then a manicure and pedicure is a nice start. If you're a spa aficionado then shoot for the 60 minute massage, facial, mani/pedi and salt glow rub!

Third

Go to the video store and get at least 3 movies. No, they do not have to be love stories. But, if you want to do a themed evening, the night is yours. Go for it.

I say 3 movies because depending on how relaxed you are after step 2, step 4 may force you to bed early.
You want movies that will allow you to sit and enjoy your chocolate while you watch them. Sit in your favorite chair or lay out in the middle of the floor - - this day is all about comfort, pampering and self-gratification. Again, if you don't do it, who will?

Turn your phone off or down. No one is to spoil this day or moment for you. You definitely do not want to talk with that one bitter friend who wants to vent. Also, you're a single parent; your instructions are below.

Fourth

Okay, you got your candy; flowers; DVD's; candles and now you smell and feel really good. You deserve a really nice dinner!
If you're not shy, go to your favorite restaurant or a new upscale restaurant you've been meaning to try. Order a meal fit for a queen/king . . . something within your budget.

If you are shy, order that meal from your favorite restaurant or new upscale restaurant you've been meaning to try. Do not go home and scarf the food down from the Styrofoam cartons while standing at the sink. Get out those plates you've been saving for that special occasion. Any day you're alive is special! Use those fancy plates to make a presentation fit for a queen/king . . . any upper member of the royal court.

Don't forget to set the table. Yes, tablecloth, cloth napkins, silverware (black plastic cutlery does not count - - plastic is plastic) and don't forget those candles.

Take the food out of the containers. Put it on the plate. Put the plate on the table. Turn on some music, unless you like to watch TV while you eat. If that is the case, set everything up in front of the TV picnic style. Keep the lit candles on a firm surface.

Enjoy your dinner.

Fifth

Once you've had your fill of steak, lobster and potatoes (or a Happy Meal - - it's your choice), it's time to get really comfortable.
Before climbing into that big comfy chair, pop in a DVD. If you need popcorn, champagne or a stogie, get it now. Once you're in the big comfy chair you may not have the strength is get back up. So, while you're getting the popcorn, get the phone and don't forget the remote either.

I know I said earlier not to answer the phone. But, once you've relaxed and eaten, you may want to be sociable. But, if not, keep the volume down and enjoy your movie.

Now, if you follow those five steps you're bound to have a great day. Actually, you're friends who are married or are in relationships may be jealous. Why? Unlike them, you are going to get exactly what you want on this day, which is promoted, to be for couples. You will not have to scream, cry or beg for anything. Nor will you have to do stupid pet tricks for substandard chocolate.

For my single-parents out there. You can have a great time with the kids (depending on their age).

Ages 0 - 3 years/Mommy is ruler of the universe for this age range. You need not change any of the above steps with exception of not forgetting to pick up your precious cargo from the daycare. Dads, same goes for you.

Ages 4 - 6/Bake cookies. There are some great pre-cut, pre-mixed selections. You cut them and allow your little darlings to place them on the cookie sheet. This is also a good time to teach kitchen safety.

Age 6 & 7/That special meal may take place at a pizza joint, but remember, it's about having fun in whatever the situation. Let them pick the restaurant. They may surprise you. But, you could be spending Valentines Day at Chuck E Cheese. If there is a Dave & Buster's near you, try to sway them in that direction. There's a bar!

Ages 8 - 12/Pray they are invited to a sleep over. Or, bake cookies!!! Or spend the day in Dave & Busters. Movies and a picnic in the living room may go over well. It's all right to use plastic. Actually, I insist you use plastic forks, spoons and tablecloth.

Ages 12 - 14/You may be able to talk them into the dinner. But, this is the age range where image is everything. They may call you a dork and suggest you start dating. Heck, they may try to hook you up with one of their teachers. Don't be offended. Be flattered they care enough to want you to be happy.

Any age above 14/good luck. I'm sure P. Diddy will do something special for his mom. But, you know you're kids don't have that kind of money. Be happy with a smile because they may not know the month, let alone the day!