Changing Attitudes in Today's Kids in the Education System

"I don't feel like it." A sixth grade student stares defiantly at his teacher as she explains for the fourth time why he needs to follow directions and set up his Language Arts binder in a specific way. Finally, after continued sighing and exclamations of "yeah but" from the student, the teacher steps in front of him and starts to arrange his notebook for him. At the end of class she shakes her head and laughs. "Was it me? Am I not explaining it enough? Do they not get it, or do they really think it's ok to argue with me?" Of course, even after ten years of teaching, I have no answer for her. All I can do is shake my head as well and follow my group of special ed kids to the next class.

Working in a public school you hear the same cliche repeated quite frequently: "Kids weren't like this when I was their age. They've gotten so much worse!" And looking around at a classroom full of students texting each other under the table, girls dressed like women twice their age, and boys with a look of open defiance in their eyes, I have to say I'm beginning to feel that this vast and sweeping generalization is indeed becoming increasingly more accurate. I also find myself constantly thinking back to what would have happened to me had I behaved this way to my teachers.

There have always been students that we as teachers were all relieved to see pass on to the next grade. The students who never showed up to class, or the ones who showed up with the sole purpose of disturbing it every five minutes. The kids who rarely participated unless it was part of their final grade, or those who wouldn't turn in homework if their life depended on it. But in my day those kids were few and far between, and even then those kids clocked most of their time in internal suspension or outside banging erasers. Now it seems that the well behaved kids who are invested in their education have become the minority, even in this quiet ,somewhat rural, upper middle class town where I now teach.

Of course it is that type of observation that continues to fuel the debate over what factors are influencing these radical shifts in student behavior. Where are these students learning their manners (or lack of, as the case may be)? Why aren't parents telling their kids that it's not acceptable to roll their eyes at the teacher when she hands out the rules of her classroom? Why are these students coming to us with the assumption that we are here to serve, rather than teach?

It's difficult to pinpoint the source of the assumptions that seem to be so deeply ingrained in our students. So many aspects of daily life effect their attitude toward school, family, and adults. It seems to me that the adult/child relationship in many family situations has developed some very questionable boundaries. For instance, the 12-year-old girl who tells me that she never gets grounded no matter what she does and that, when she turns 16, her parents will be buying her a Louis Vuitton purse. What type of example are her parents setting for her about respecting adults, when they are so obviously not demanding respect from her at home? Yet, this student comes to me on an education plan because she has difficulty paying attention in class. I have to examine that statement and wonder if this is behavior that she has learned as a byproduct of not having to pay attention to what her parents say because it's not as if anyone at home is going to enforce the rules! And why is it that a 12-year-old not only understands the significant value of a Louis Vuitton purse, but can also identify that a classmate's Coach purse is indeed real and not a flea market ripoff? I see this as a glaring red flag that this child's priorities are seriously out of balance.

My feeling of frustration over "kids these days" also extends to moments like that which I had this afternoon when one youngster, who can't read from a textbook, whips out not one, but TWO handheld gaming systems and proceeds to explain to me what each part does and how to play each game. This is what he does to occupy himself at the after school program until five o'clock everyday. Now, I'm well aware that I am not the only teacher who feels this way. I constantly hear comments in the teacher's lounge about how little respect these students have for their education and for their teachers. They share stories of students, who at the age of 12 still don't know the difference between a city and a state, are floundering in their academics, and will most likely struggle to meet the standards set by high stakes testing. And as they tell these stories, I can see the frustration growing for each of these seasoned professionals who came into education thinking they were there to push students to succeed in academics, only to find that this is not at all what the students themselves have in mind!

The never-ending question is how to reorder kids' priorities. How do I, a teacher who only sees my students for about five hours a day, make them understand that the new IPod Touch is not nearly as important as learning how to write an expository essay? I know that these students will go home, drop their backpack wherever it happens to land, then run upstairs to chat with their friends online without giving their homework a second thought. I also know that their parents will most likely half heartedly inquire as to whether or not they did said homework, though they won't make it a priority to make sure it gets done. So how can teachers be expected to undo all that in a six hour period? How do we teach our students that teachers are teachers because we've been trained to give them the knowledge and skills they need to succeed and we deserve respect because of that? If anyone has the magic answer for me, I will be eternally grateful. Until then, I will, like most every other teacher I know, continue to shake my head and say, "Kids these days have gotten so much worse..."