Chips! A Guide on How to Make Your Own Delicious Chips

Chips! Ahhh, how the very mention of it makes me nostalgic for the old country (England) and the myriad of wonderful Fish & Chip shops strewn across that country. Luckily however, before emigrating the States (I pledge allegiance and all that) my Father (aka: dad) showed me how to make one mean chip (well, more than one!). A chip on a par with those served in some of the best chip shops around. Certainly a million miles better than the horrible sorry-looking soggy chips/French-fries served in most restaurants in this country. So if you're in the mood for some home-made chips (Please, don't say fries! - That's like saying Soccer instead of Football) then read on.

For (2) people (me and the Mrs.) I find that four good size potatoes' provides about the right amount of chips to sate the appetite. The first thing to do is pick (4) decent size potatoes. I usually find that big old Idaho potatoes taste best. Next you'll want to peel the potatoes. I like to use the small 'T' shaped peelers that you can get nowadays. You hold them like tiny little mini-window washers and pull over the potato lengthways. This easily pulls strips of peel off the sexy tuber. It's a lot quicker than the old-fashioned peelers, which you have to grasp between thumb and forefinger and which gave me something akin to Carpal-Tunnel-Syndrome after I'd peeled about two potatoes. To aide in the ease of the peelage, place the (4) potatoes in a plastic strainer and run them under mid-temp. water whilst peeling. This shouldn't take more than 5 minutes or so to do. By doing it this way the peel is caught by the strainer and you don't have to spend 10 minutes trying to peel the peels (so to speak) off of the sink, which I for one find very unappealing (I apologize, Corny I know).

The next step is to get the biggest cutting board you have available and proceed to cut up the potatoes into decent sized chips. Obviously there is a personal preference regarding chip-size but I like my chips on the meatier side. To begin I cut the peeled potatoes in half lengthwise. Each half is cut again leaving me with (4) quarters from (1) potato. Stay with me know. Then I'll split each quarter into about (4) chips, which if my math is correct will leave us with 16 Chips gleaned from a single potato. This should give you a fairly substantial chip unless you started off with miniscule potatoes. So a total of 64 chips from the 4 potatoes. Remember, you don't want 'French-fry's, you want chips! Believe me when I tell you not to cut the chips too thin. Another reason for not having skinny chips is that they just won't fry up right. A skinny chip will just turn into a long thin crisp with no body, whereas what you're trying to get is a slightly crispy brown outer shell and a slightly fluffy body. That's the goal anyway.

Next heat up a big pot of water and once boiling put in the chips. Leave the heat on and once the water is boiling once again leave for 2 minutes. Next step is to dry off the chips. I usually take a few sheets of Paper-Towels and dab the chips until they are as dry as I can get them. I can't pretend to know the chemistry behind it but a dry chip just cooks better than a wet chip, so you'll just have to trust me on this.

Get a large Stainless Steel Pot with cover and place on your stove. Measure and pour in (2) pints of Vegetable Oil from something like a Pyrex Measuring cup and put the heat on high. It's best not to wander off while it's heating up as from my experience it doesn't take long before the oil is hot and sizzling. About (8) minutes usually. It is hard sometimes however to tell when the oil hot enough. You may see a slight steam come off the oil but the easiest way to check is to take (One) chip and drop it in. You'll want to see the oil fizzle all around the chip and basically smother the chip under hot boiling bubbles. If the oil is anything less than hot, hot, hot! and you put the chips in; it just won't turn out right. I have found that out from experience. Once you're getting a good fizz and spit from your oil and test chip then carefully slide all the chips off the cutting board into the pot. It should fizzle and spit (I love saying that) like a Vampire in daylight and you'll want to see a good bubbling, fizzy cauldron of heat. Imagine Dante's depiction of hell, well that's what you want your chips to be experiencing. Delight in the pain and suffering of innocent drawn and quartered tubers.

Get yourself a nice long-stemmed wooden spoon and quickly use it to move the chips around in the pot, so that you get as even a covering of oil on all the chips. I usually leave the spoon in the pot; put the lid on, with a slight gap where the spoon protrudes and wait a couple of minutes. About every two or three minutes I'll take the lid off and stir the chips again. If you don't stir sometimes the chips may stick to the bottom of the pot or to each other. It also helps to give an even coating to all the chips surfaces. Keep doing this until your chips have reached the desired appearance. What you'll want to see a nice golden brown coat on all your chips. At which point take the pot off heat and drain the oil back into the measuring cup, making sure to use gloved hands and it's advisable to drain the oil back into the cup over the sink in case of splashes.. Note, you can re-use about 80 % of the oil again. I usually keep a bottle of the vegetable oil just for chips. Once the used oil has cooled you can slowly pour it back into the bottle. Slowly so that you don't get the small remnants that will be at the bottom of the cup, which you can discard.

Once you have drained the Pot of the oil add a couple of shakes of salt to the chips. Put the lid back on and holding the pot and cover with gloved hands shake every which way for an even distribution of the salt. You should be set to go with your chips.

Potatoes have more taste/flavor than I think most people give them credit for and if you are successful in producing a great chip they taste great on their own. However, if you should want to spice things up a little bit then you can use a myriad of sauces. The choice is yours. You can use the traditional like Ketchup or you can use Mayonnaise, Horseradish, Vinegar or my favorite honey-barbecue sauce, whatever tickles you're fancy.

Voila you have (Hopefully) succeeded in creating masterful chips.

Here's a quick and simple re-cap:

1: Take (4) Good size Idaho Potato's
2: Peel Potatoes, (5) Minutes
4: Get big pot of water and boil
3: Whilst water is heating up get your cutting board out and cut potatoes in half (lengthwise) and cut again and again until you have approx (16) chips from each potato. It takes about (5) Minutes to cut up the potatoes.
5: Once water bubbling place chips in boiling water, leave on heat until water is boiling and again and leave for (2) minutes
6: Remove Chips and dry (as best you can) with paper towels
7: Get your largest pot (with lid) and pour in (2) Pints of Vegetable Oil from something like a Pyrex measuring cap.
8: Put heat on high. Usually takes about (8) minutes for oil to get good and hot.
9: Test that oil is Hot, Hot, and Hot with a sample chip. Want to see massive bubblage. Chip should disappear neath a plethora of spitting oil.
10: Pour all chips into pot. Careful it's hot remember and the oil can spit at you a little.
11: Get Long Handled Wooden Spoon and immediately stir to stop Chips sticking to pot & each other.
12: Keep the heat on high put lid on with gap where the wooden spoon protrudes.
13: Once every 2 or 3 minutes stir chips to assure even coverage. It takes about 20-22 minutes for the chips to get the right color.
14: Once Chips are a Toasty Golden Brown color you can bet your chips are ready for consumption
15: Drain the oil back into the beaker. Once cooled you can re-use about 80% of the oil and dispose of the junk at the bottom.
16: Add a couple of sprinkles of salt to the chips. Shake the pot with lid on every which way for even coverage.
17: Serve with Vinegar, Sauce, Mayonnaise, Ketchup, Barbeque Sauce (the choice is yours)

I have two recommendations for chip lovers everywhere, if you can't be bothered to make your own. Both do wonderful chips and I speak from experience, not 2nd hand. The first is in Brooklyn:

The Park Slope Chip Shop, 383 Fifth Ave. (at 6th St.) Brooklyn, NY 11215

Very nice chips. Great big portions for about $3.50. I usually share one portion with the Mrs. They also do other excellent British pub-food fare

The next is in Manhattan:

Pommes Frittes, 123 2nd Ave. New York City, NY 10003 (2nd Ave. between 7 & 8 St.)

Not traditional British Chips but Belgian Fried chips, Fried twice according to their web-site with a wonderful array of sauces. I particularly like the melon Sauce that they have.

The last place I'm going to list is another well known place for chips in Manhattan, but I've never actually tried their stuff, although by all accounts they do great British chips. I was reminded of them from a recent show on the food network called 'Throwdown' where the host/cook 'Bobby Flay' challenges various restaurants and specialty food eateries in cook offs. He lost needless to say. I shall have to pay them a visit some time.

A Salt & Battery, 112 Greenwich Avenue, (12th & 13th Streets), New York, NY 10011