Christmas with a Freak!

"Wearing black and feeding cats, I hope get green shoes!"

It's that time of year when all the freaks are in hiding. They close the curtains and gather together for their own special kind of season celebration in a way only a true freak can know. At least that's what we would like to think. But the truth is they are out there shopping along with all the rest of us. They are buying gifts for their best friends and for people they don't even know. They buy gifts for people they hope to share a special bond with in the strangest of ways. Sometimes they look just like anyone else shopping until you peek into their carts and ask yourself where they found the leather flower with velvet leaves.

Perhaps you are a freak yourself and doing the shopping for your favorite freak magnet known as your very best friend. Maybe your own child is the freak and has you wondering what in the wide world of weird are you getting this year! It's never the same and it's always something you will never use, can't figure out what it is or you hide it away for fear the neighbors will see and start laughing all over again this year. A freak can find things no one else has ever seen in any store. It seems they have there own places to shop or they are artistically inclined for creating something totally bizarre.

But you gotta love them! It's hard to get rid of them and they can be really interesting and fun. You just have to let go of your own fears of what Christmas morning holds for you. No matter if you are the freaky parents or the parents of a freak it's never a dull moment on Christmas day when all the relatives show up and ask "What did you get this time?".

You start off with your normal Christmas tree with lights and decorations just like all the neighbors, but when you look closely you notice something has been added. It's a very nice string of black and white beads giving it a touch of class. Then you look a little closer and notice each bead is a skull and crossbones. You just try to ignore it and look at the tree and how beautiful it looks with the other decorations. The red balls, the blue bow's and the little nooses. Nooses? Just forget it and be thankful the tree doesn't explode. So far!

The gifts under the tree are beautiful. There are the large ones you got for each member of the family and the little ones someone must have placed underneath the tree before you got home today. They are pretty. Even if the wrapping paper is yellow and black. Your little freak is a lovable and giving creature of the dark and you love them no matter what anyone else thinks. You're sure there will be more gifts and just hope none of them are alive and hungry when opened.

Finally Christmas morning has arrives and it's time to open the gifts. The family gathers around the tree. You little freak just happens to be your teenage daughter at the time and she got mom a wonderful perfume called, "Scent of Darkness." It does smell good and that's all that matter. For dad he pulls a tee shirt from the box in the color black (of course) with a picture shoes on the front. No one is sure what it means, but it fits. Little brother got a box of rubber snakes and he loves them as he tries to scare everyone in the room with them. For our daughter in black pj's she is thrilled when she opens her gift and there are green shoes with purple laces. They are perfect. Other gifts include a book on how to read your dreams, a black rose, a clock that screams when it's time to wake up, fishnet stockings, fake tattoos, red lipstick with black lip liners, a feather boa and a pillow made of some kind of fur.

Finally the rest of the family starts to arrive and hugs are exchanged, drinks are served and more gifts appear under the tree. You look around and notice a trend. Grandma and Grandpa are wearing matching jogging suits in the brightest blue you have ever seen. They are passing around candy shaped like dog doo and laughing. Your dear sister has shown up in the same old fashion dress from an era many years past that she always wears for Christmas because it reminds her cowboys on the open plains. Your older brother is wearing red pants with a green shirt so he will appear festive and is chasing everyone with misseltoe. His three kids are dressed as elves and pinching everyone in the room on the rear. Rubber snakes are flying across the room and people are screaming and laughing at the same time. Wrapping paper is everywhere, the dog looks like a gifts because he has so many bow's stuck to his head and the cat is in hiding for the winter.

You reflect again on this special day and thank the stars above for your normal daughter. It seems she comes from a family of freaks by honest means. They are all loving and weird and wonderful in their own way and it's a good thing, no a great thing they only come together once a year! Merry Christmas and happy holidays. May you receive the strangest gift of all!