Chronicles of an Alcoholic: Am I Really an Alcoholic?

Every time I drink a beer or sit at a bar, I wonder, "Am I an Alcoholic?" I know exactly when it all began. One day my college roommates decided to host a small gathering to christen our new apartment. After collecting donations someone drove to the liquor store and brought back Arbor Mist, Malibu Rum, and a few other tasty drinks. That night I drank a little bit of everything. When I woke up the next morning I felt like a little bit of nothing. My body erupted into short and violent convulsions while I gagged. Was I an alcoholic then?

Now I tend to drink alone or with people I don't know, which brings me to example #235: It all happened on New Years day 2007. I was broke, friendless, and in the mood to party. First I went to a popular neighborhood bar and met some really cool men who were apparently not interested in me romantically. We headed to the club across the street and danced all night long. Free drinks came from all directions. After dancing on stage with the DJ, flirting with everyone, and making a complete fool of myself, I left to find my vehicle. But it wasn't outside. Someone had stolen my car. I went back to the neighborhood bar and got into a fight with the 200 pound + male bartender (I'm a mere 110 pounds and female) because he wouldn't let me use the phone. I walked around for miles seeking help. It was dark, cold, and rainy. Strangers attempted to assist me but I wouldn't let them. I cried and yelled the entire time, like the mentally broken schizophrenic. Finally, with the help of a police woman (who I called a very mean name), I was able to get home. Two months later it was determined my car was never stolen, but abandoned. Someone called a towing company. Apparently they wanted their parking space back. And yet and still I ask myself, "Am I an Alcoholic?"

I know I have a problem, but am I really an alcoholic? My friends recommend I regulate my alcohol intake. When I started drinking, merely four years ago, I thought I could drink everything without limit. Now, I'm more honest with myself. I've stopped mixing darks with lites, drinking different drinks in one sitting, and have increased my water consumption. There has been a dramatic drop in alcohol based incidents but that doesn't mean I am not an alcoholic or does it?

To be continued...