Coffee Calms

Alright, people. It's a chicken and egg thing. Coffee causes? Pshah! In a porker's eye.

Coffee causes calmness. Coffee causes sleep. A soporific sweetness envelops the coffee drinker. Lassitude arrives, then nodding out. That's what coffee does.

So why do 90 percent feel coffee jazzes them up? Because they are already predisposed. That's it. They are like spoons just waiting to be filled with something to push them into terminal anxiety.

Read this. I'll be back.

Caffeine's Effect on ADHD Symptoms | Psych Central: "Anecdotal evidence suggests that many individuals are already using caffeine to self-medicate ADHD in themselves or their children. Many sufferers find it has the opposite effect than it does in other people: instead of making them more active and stimulated, it actually has more of a 'calm-down' effect, and encourages sleep."

Now the people that coffee calms down are the ten percent who are sensible enough to have no patience with the world as it is. They are said to have a deficit. The people who say this don't know a deficit when they see it. This is Kafka on steroids. Sick. It's true.

And now we have the proof. Had we in the 19th century been truly advanced, we would have had letters to describe our tendency to snooze off. ABCDE or whatever. We live in a madhouse filled with acronyms and if we protest or tune out we are given a set of initials.

Thank you, most benificent society. And if you do not think benificent is a word, think again.

Signing off for now. Time for another cup of java and some sleep.

"Coffee Calms You Down - At Last Someone Understands." Once again Adam Panflick returns, channeling Mark Twain. None of the following is true, although one never knows. It might be. Humor.