Collect Them All

It is a well-known scientific fact that money makes the world go around. Some of you astro-physicists out there (you know who you are) are probably scoffing and saying, "Actually, gravity is what causes the earth to rotate, not money." Well, smarties, how do you think the gravity gets paid for? Not with cosmic particles. With money. Proving once again that astro-physicists ain't always rocket scientists.

Now if you have paid for anything lately, and most of you have (except my brother- in- law) chances are you used money. Money has been used to pay for stuff since ancient times, as evidenced by a pottery shard found in Damascus which when translated reads:

'Ahmed, pay the money you owe me for that goat you bought, or I will be forced to break more of your pottery.'

Sincerely,

Ak-mak of Ak-mak's Pre-owned Goats.

Instead of using it to pay for things, some people have begun to collect money in the form of coins. These people are called coin-collectors, or numismatists ( from an ancient Damascan expression meaning; nerd).

I must admit, I got caught up in coin-collecting myself for a time when they began to put different states on the backs of quarters. Many of the so-called states were places with fanciful names that no-one had ever heard of, like; Delaware, or Connecticut. Then came Rhode Island, Long Island, North Hampshire, South Hampshire, Nova Scotia, to name just a few. They went through dozens and dozens of states, and collectors like me were snapping them up and hoarding them. The factory that makes the coins was literally making a mint off of us.

After a while they got to our state, Colorado. It has a mountain on it and with powerful magnification I can see my town. With further magnification you can even see a quarter someone dropped on the sidewalk outside the Steaming Bean Cafe. With more magnification you can see that it is a Colorado quarter with a mountain on it. At this point I do not suggest more magnification or you could get caught in a paradoxal loop. You do not want that, trust me.

Since the Colorado quarter, like a hundred other states have come out and there is no end in sight. With the Hubble telescope they discover new states almost every day. No one could feasibly collect them all. So I have given up on the state quarter craze. I have decided to do something bold with all the quarters I had collected. I have decided to spend them. After all, there is a guy I owe some money to for a goat.