Commitment & Dedication: Two Key Fundamental Elements to a Successful Relationship

While at a youth conference as a dedicated volunteer I was working with the kids eating lunch. In the process of thinking how committed many had been to the church I saw a brother whom I hadn't seen for some time. I wondered what he had been up to these days. What I learned from him on this day taught me more about love than I had ever imagined.

Love & Dedications

This brother saw me and said "You are dedicated and consistent". My response was "Who me". Now, I will admit. I am passionate about my church. I am humbly thankful to God everyday for the blessing I get. The fact is, God is able and supplies all my needs all the time. I have no choice but to give thanks and know that my dedication to the Church pales in comparison to God's dedication to us all. The word says in John 3:16 for God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son. That is Love.

But he continued to state that I was dedicated. He stated that I was there at the beginning. He remembered in the beginning of his ministry that I was there. I had always been there and I was consistently dedicated to the church for the last 15 years at least. That word really touched my heart. I had not realized that I had been here for that long. But more than that, I was surprised that he noticed and remembered. In this time of my dedication, this man and I spoke maybe 10 times. 15 year and 10 conversation is not a lot to remember. Yet and still this brother professed my dedication like a long lost relative.

Love & Commitment

The brother told me why he had been away for some time. It was his Love for his wife. His wife was his chosen bride. Now this brother was something of an oddity. He was a smart man, whose commitment to God was without questions. His commitment to the homeless was on a monthly basis to help cloth them and give out food. His commitment to the youth was every Saturday for 4 hours to mentor them to become men. His commitment to the church was to be there every Sunday for year until perhaps the last few.

Now the reason why this brothers commitment changed surprised me. He got married. Granted marriage is a commitment. I am not faulting the brother for it. I know if I had a wife I would be committed to her until death do us part. I believe in marriage and have no interest in cheating of divorce.

The Brother continued, in saying he choose his mate carefully. His commitment was such that he looked at criteria first. For his commitment, he consider his loves, credit score, health, financial stability, relationship with God and passion for the community. With his commitment to this concepts, he found a woman with over 800 on all three credit scores. With his commitment, he found a woman that was a vegetarian that love to work out an be healthy. With is commitment, he found a woman with a good job that made over 6 figures. With his commitment, he found a woman that love the Lord as much as he did. With his commitment, he found a woman more precious than rubies.

Love

I was happy for him. It is a blessing to find Love. As a single man, I hope one day to have that Love again some day soon. But as he spoke he shook his head. I knew there was much more to the story. He stated that his perfect mate has cancer. Not only does she have cancer, but the cancer is incurable and virtually untreatable. His wife has cancer of the spine. He said that is it a painful thing to see the one you love suffer so much. The suffering she endures was greater than child birth in her own eyes. Her spine was being crushed and twisted as it deteriorated from the cancer. The sensitive nerve ending in her spine were constantly in pain and on fire. Many days the love his life spent 12 hours in pain yelling, screaming and crying until she cried herself to sleep. In that 12 hours, he was with her to show love. The only thing he could do to show love was to be with her and give her the morphine drips when he could.

He stated that on Valentine's day he was use to going to Vitoria secrets, or Godiva to show Love. The past Valentine day he bought depends and wiped his Love down in a sponge bath. He was challenged to say that he did all that was right and still found this to be his struggle. I noticed we all are going through it. Even those without financial need have challenges.

This brother Love the church and his wife. He was thankful on this day that she was doing much better. His family was with his wife today which allowed him to be there at the church to volunteer as needed. His presence was a blessing to the boys. His words were a blessing to me.. I as a man am innately selfish. We all have wants and need that we hope to satisfy. In Gayle Sayers book "I am third" it talks about a brother's commitment to the greater good. The point of the book me third is to put God 1st., your family and community second, and me third. When you place yourself in that position you will be blessed to be a blessing. This man, was a living reflection of Love and the primary example of what Gayle sayer described as a Good man. My point is this inspired me and I hope it touched you too.