Commonly Butchered Words and Phrases in the English Language

I will admit that English is probably not the easiest language in the world to learn. However, some folks who have spoken it all of their lives seem to have a real knack for misusing words and turning phrases to the point that their sentences are barely recognizable as part of the English language. Some of those mistakes are heard so often that many people think what was said or written is actually correct. I don't claim to be your old junior high English language teacher, but there are certain common mistakes that just seem to set my teeth on edge. Allow me to mention a few.

1. "Flustrated." How many times have you heard someone say that he is really flustrated about something? As you may be aware, this is not a formally recognized English word. It is, however, a portmanteau, or parts of two legitimate words married together (erroneously, in this case) to form a third "made-up" word. Obviously, this person is either frustrated or flustered, but not flustrated.

2. "I could care less." Here's another English phrase problem. Probably, the speaker means he couldn't care less. If he could care less, it means that he cares to some degree, which is the exact opposite of the meaning he is trying to convey.

3. "Irregardless." Look it up in an English dictionary. You may find it, but it is not recognized formally, and is typically avoided in formal writing. It is probably the mixture of regardless and irrespective, words that are somewhat similar in meaning, but not identical. Certainly the speaker does not need all of those syllables to state that he will be "happy with the way the team played regardless of the final score of the game."

4. The mispronunciation of "warranty." The correct way to say this word is to place the emphasis on the first syllable...WARR-untee. Too many folks confuse this word with its synonym, the word guarantee, which does have the emphasis on the double-e ending. While in many cases these two words can be used interchangeably, they certainly are not pronounced alike.

5. The mispronunciation of words like "sales." Some English speaking folks have a really difficult time putting the long "A" sound in words like sales, jails, and tails. When you hear them actually say those words, it sounds more like sells, gels, and tells. A lazy tongue can make the listener work very hard to completely understand what the speaker is trying to say.

6. "Affect or effect?" So many English speaking people are affected by the effect of using the wrong versions of these two similar words. It's really not that difficult. As a general rule, use the word affect as a verb, and the word effect as a noun. One common exception is that it one can "effect a change," which means to make a change come into existence.

7. "Loose versus lose." Many people write the word loose, when they really mean to use the word lose. Rather than looking up the correct English spelling, they just throw in enough o's that they think they are covered. When confused, think of it this way. If your car handle is loose, you may lose it while driving down the road. One word is an adjective (loose), and the other is a verb (lose). Okay, I know that in the Battle Hymn, God "loosed the fateful lightning of His terrible swift sword", but that really means He broke it out and used it. It doesn't mean that He could no longer find it when He wanted to use it.

8. Misspelling the word "separate." So many times, you will see the word separate spelled seperate. Again, instead of consulting an English dictionary, the writer supposes that the word is spelled like it sounds, in which case an "e" will work as well as an "a" in the middle syllable. Try to remember it this way, when you separate something, you are taking it apart, just as you would if you were cutting it with a "paring" knife. After you cut it with the knife, the two halves will be equal, or "on par" with each other. Get it? P-A-R is the base word for S-E-P-A-R-A-T-E.

9. Hisself. This one's easy. It doesn't exist formally in the English language. Try using himself.

10. Other common butchering of the English language. There are no d's in congratulations. Advise someone by giving them advice. Someone can be spasmodic about something, but they cannot be sposmatic, because the word doesn't exist. "A whole 'nother thing" is easily said, but difficult to write formally in the English language. Their is a word, but thier is not. Here is not the same as hear.

I realize that none of us write or speak the English language totally without error, regardless of how hard we may try. One who is attempting to put his best foot forward for a potential new boss or impress the general public, however, may want to polish his/her language skills by remembering some of the things that were supposed to have been learned back in those junior high English classes.