Confessions of a Stay at Home Mom

Heather Michelle
The life of the stay at home mom (SAHM) is one that is often criticized and largely misunderstood. Ever wonder what we do all day? Delve deep into the confessions of a stay at home mom.

1.We clean sometimes, but not nearly as much as we lead you to believe.
Cleaning is a task that is seemingly never ending. There is always laundry to be done, dishes to be washed, beds to be made, floors to be vacuumed, and so many more chores. The stay at home mom does indeed handle all of these cleaning responsibilities. The secret is that we do not do all of these chores as often as we may lead you to believe. For the most part, chores can be done quickly even though we may hint that they took much longer. Cleaning is a task that stay at home moms must tackle, but it is not as bad as we let on.

2. We take naps.
Yes, it's true. We take naps if we are so inclined. Those of us with younger children may sleep when they sleep. Those with older children who are in school have the freedom to nap whenever they please. The stay at home mom is on call at every moment of the day and so we are entitled to getting a nice relaxing nap in during the day.

3. We enjoy doing errands most of the time.
The life of a stay at home mom can be very stressful with a list of things to get accomplished while managing to care for the children. We enjoy running those mundane errands to the grocery store and post office because it gets us out of the house. We can listen to music in the car and chill out for the short ride. Sometimes it is taxing if the children are acting up, but for the most part it is a nice break to the day.

4. We would rather be working.
This is not true for every stay at home mom, but the thought passes through our heads more often than many people think. Being a stay at home mom is a very rewarding job but being in the workforce also gives a sense of identity and accomplishment that staying home doesn't.

5. Contradictory to number 4, we want nothing more than to raise our children.
Raising a child is one of the most important jobs any person can do. These children deserve the love and attention of their parents and there is no better way to give them that then being with them all day. As a stay at home mom, we are responsible for the development of our children and we love doing what we do.

6. We have plenty of time for entertainment.
Yes, the average stay at home mom has time to watch television, surf the Internet, and enjoy all sorts of entertainment throughout the day. Many can recall an image of a woman laying on the couch eating bon bons and watching the soaps on television. While it is not so luxurious, we certainly do take time in the day to relax with our tivo.

7. We get frustrated.
The main job of the stay at home mom is to raise her children. This task can be very difficult. Staying home with a child who is rambunctious, tired, or sick can be very draining on our mental health. While we love our children dearly, it is easy to get frustrated with them. For this reason, we often need a break at the end of the day. We are often met with the attitude of "Why would you need a break, what did you do all day?" This is infuriating so do not assume that we have done nothing if we are feeling frustrated and need a break.

8. We feel entitled to a paycheck.
The stay at home mom does the work of caregiver, maid, nurse, chef, chauffer, and accountant. A recent study stated that if a stay at home mom were to release these duties and have to pay for all of these services, it would cost an estimated $70,000 a year. That is a lot of money. It is no surprise then that we would be deserving of a paycheck. While we know that this is not going to happen any time in the near future, we can cling to our belief that what we are doing is worthy of a paycheck.

9. We are envious of our counterparts.
The stay at home mom generally has a partner who is out working and bringing home that enviable paycheck. There are days when we would gladly trade positions and go work while our partner stayed home. We want the freedom to leave the home, knowing that our children are in capable hands. Again, I digress; this is not all of the time, just on those rough days.

10. We love our children more than anything in this world.
We make sacrifices as a stay at home mom. We make this life our identity. We do this because we are madly in love with our children and want the best of everything for them. This love makes being a stay at home mom the best job in the world.

Disclaimer: While this article is told from personal experience, there are stay at home moms who differ in opinion. Not everyone is the same. Yes, there are some who strive for perfection and the immaculately clean home at all times. There are also stay at home moms who stay at home simply because they can or because they don't want to work as opposed to having their children's best interest in mind. There is a broad spectrum of stay at home moms, but these confessions apply to most of them.

Published by Heather Michelle

Heather Grenier is the author of The Bride and Groom's Wedding Checklist and Planner Guide.  View profile

  • The stay at home mom does have time to spend on herself.
  • The stay at home mom deserves a paycheck.
  • The stay at home mom loves her children more than anything else.
In 2004 there were 5.6 million stay at home moms in The United States according to the census.

53 Comments

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  • ruthlbc1/30/2011

    I can relate! I am a SAHM to toddler TWINS! I also work part time, from home which sounds so perfect, right??There are days when I am just toast by the time Daddy gets home.I try to balance every moment that my kids need me and then I try to work in between. I must admit, I do feel guilty when I put them down for their ONE nap during the day: should I nap or kick back and watch some mind numbing TV, or work? It's a challenge each day. Still as hard as it is, I cannot bring myself to send my kids to total strangers. PS I was going to work after they were born but I just could not do it. Being with them has been an amazing experience, but let's be honest, it's not without it's challenges.

  • Sarah11/13/2010

    hmmm, I take naps and feel like a horrible housewife, my house is often trashed no matter how often I clean it. I do watch t.v. when I need to sit down to relax (of course I got to relax more when I was a working mom! lol) I never really stretch the truth on how long it takes me to do things though because I'm always embarrased because it seems like it takes me too long to do everything!

  • Sarah11/13/2010

    hmmm, I take naps and feel like a horrible housewife, my house is often trashed no matter how often I clean it. I do watch t.v. when I need to sit down to relax (of course I got to relax more when I was a working mom! lol) I never really stretch the truth on how long it takes me to do things though because I'm always embarrased because it seems like it takes me too long to do everything!

  • KT7/13/2010

    How can you say "There is a broad spectrum of stay at home moms, but these confessions apply to most of them."

    HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?!?! Do you know most stay at home moms?

    Although I do not fall in to your mold of the "typical" sahm, I also don't believe most of them are napping and feel entitled to compensation for caring for their child.

  • Kristy Pool6/13/2010

    Loved this article! It would be so much easier to have an office job. Being a stay at home mom is SO not for sissies!

  • BS10/29/2009

    yeah. moms who work aren't madly in love with their children.

  • Susan8/23/2009

    Thank you for writing this. I truly felt like the worst mother ever because I do the things you wrote. I felt guilty for my house not being spotless ALL the time!

    Thanks to you I will not feel guilty for taking my daily naps or for watching television in the morning.

  • Mrs.Rogers11/12/2008

    I am one also, thanks it was fun to read. So true.

  • Emylou8/3/2008

    great article...i can soooo relate to most of the points....:-) I don't watch a lot of TV, though...

  • DSH3/25/2008

    Who wrote those take-aways? They're not based on the article.

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