Confused About College? Quit!

Hey, you. That's right, you with the bulging backpack and the caffeine-induced glaze. Put away that calculator and that overdue homework assignment; I've got something to tell you. This isn't on the syllabus, so you can take it for what it's worth, but it might at least give you something to think about while you try to cram some more information into your stressed cerebellum. My advice to you is: drop out and get a job.

Why would I tell you this? To free up a valuable parking space, of course. Actually, think of it as a public service. While there are some people who graduate and go straight into a fulfilling career, most of you students are probably going to move aimlessly about, not knowing what the hell to do with your sheepskin. Other than using it to cover the hole in the wall, that is. Let me save you the trouble.

The trouble with most college graduates coming fresh out of the pens is that they really have no idea what they want to do. This is not unusual; your average student changes majors about three times while in school, and can expect to change jobs between five and eight times during their lives, according to recent statistics. Still, it leads to frustration. As brand spanking new entrants to the "real world" (this doesn't count non-trads, who generally have been around the block a few times), most graduates have unrealistic expectations about finding a job in their field or a job at all. Many times recent graduates, especially those in what are considered liberal arts disciplines, find themselves forced to accept jobs that they feel are beneath them.

I understand this feeling very well; I've been there. After graduating in a year I don't wish to name with a degree in math, my wife and I moved to a decent-sized city in hopes of finding a decent job. After a solid month of searching non-stop, I managed to find a job...at $6.50 an hour (yes, this was before minimum wage reached its present dizzying height). Needless to say, I felt a little upset. A college graduate in a difficult discipline earning $6.50 an hour? Preposterous! Or so I thought, until I walked into McDonald's one night and found a fellow I'd graduated with (his degree was in math education) working as a shift manager. Suddenly, I was quite thankful for my job.

A friend of mine, who also graduated at the same time as I did, also ended up at McDonald's, carrying her B.A. in English in hand. She later told me, half-jokingly, that you had to have a B.A. just to work there (this was in an isolated university town, however, so the alternatives were slight.) My wife, who worked as the assistant manager at a convenience store in this same isolated town, told me of applicants who listed bachelor's degrees and master's degrees on their applications, which she had to reject; despite what you may think of political science, carrying a master's in that discipline tends to put you beyond the range of a minimum wage job. I worked for a temp agency in Boise for a (mercifully) short while, and did an informal poll one day. Out of roughly twelve employees on that particular project, only one did not have at least an associate's degree. I won't tell you what the average wage was, but (to put it bluntly) it sucked.

Obviously, there are more factors at work here than just the education of the folks involved. Geographic location, local industries and the economy all play a part. However, the statistics and trend indicators have been building too long to just ignore. Your parents and professors would have you believe that you can not get a decent job without a degree anymore. That may be true, but it also depends on how you define decent. I've held decent jobs alongside folks with much less education and experience (in some cases) working in my department doing similar jobs and earning similar wages. The situation is neither good nor bad; it just is.

What's the alternative, you may wonder? Get a job, any kind of job. For high-level professional jobs, you will almost certainly need a degree, but you're not going to get that type of job out of school in any case. Employers value education but need experience more; that fact is constant, and will not change anytime soon. Work your way up in a company, figure out what the hell you want to do with your life and then go to school. I've known people who have spent six or seven years in school working towards a degree because they keep changing their minds. That's not education, that's just jerking off. Why put yourself in debt and waste your time?

Then again, you may be one of those people who know exactly what you want. You have no attachments, you're ready and willing to relocate to find a job in your field, you're on track with your degree. Maybe you even have some relevant experience to your chosen field. If these factors apply, then keep going. You may be able to make the transition with no problems, and if so, godspeed to you. Everybody else may want to consider putting off the ivory towers of academia for a while. Whatever pitfalls there may be out there, at least most jobs don't give you homework to do. Well, not as much, anyway.