Controlling Panic Attacks: My Experience

I experienced my first panic attack while driving, which has to be the single worst experience of my life. I suddenly couldn't breathe- I thought it was an asthma attack at first- my palms were sweating, and all I could think of was getting away from where I was. I pulled into a parking lot and took a hit off my inhaler, and still couldn't breathe, but I also found myself wanting to run away, wanting to escape, and I couldn't stay in the car. It felt confining. I got out and walked into the nearby grocery store, trying to figure out what the heck was going on, but that felt scary, too, because of all the people. I wanted to go home more than anything, and I went back to my car and drove home. On the way home, my chest loosened, and I felt myself collapsing. I was abruptly exhausted. I went home and took a nap, but when I woke up I had questions and no answers.

I went online and searched on anxiety and chest constriction, and found "panic attacks," listed as a possible result. But I couldn't figure out what had triggered it. Certainly, driving is scary- but I had driven in Chicago, New York City, Dallas, Orlando, and Tampa and had never had a panic attack. So why now? Why in Tallahassee, where the traffic is nothing, am I suddenly having a panic attack? I couldn't figure it out, and it frustrated me.

I turned to my psychiatrist for help, and he pointed to my recent episode of PTSD, and informed me that this was probably part and parcel of that. He told me that panic attacks are common among people with PTSD and that I could expect them, particularly on days after I'd had nightmares.

That wasn't a promising diagnosis, considering how often I was having nightmares.

I asked him how I could deal with the panic attacks, and he gave me a couple of strategies. The first thing he told me was to control my breathing. He told me that the panic attack is not an actual asthma attack, but that if I am not careful, it could trigger an asthma attack because often people start breathing shallowly when they experience panic attacks.

He told me to breathe deeply and slowly, despite the panic in my head.

Then he told me to focus on something else. He told me to practice during times I am not stressed, to pick something that makes me happy and think about it, to choose something tactile if I could, like my husband or pets, so that I could add in physical touch. I chose my cats. I thought about how it felt to pet them, to snuggle their purring bodies, how one of them crawls into my lap and puts his paws around my neck. It was very hard to hold onto that thought during a panic attack, but I did it as best as I could.

He told me that for some people it is best to do another activity that relaxes them, and for others it is better to lie down and focus on breathing and on the happy thought- he said I should try both to see which works for me. For me, washing dishes or cleaning works best. When I lie down and try to focus on breathing and happy thoughts, I get into a "fight" with my mind. Part of my brain is going "ACK PANIC ATTACK!" and the other part is going "happy thoughts, kitties, my snuggly boys," and the two parts just don't want to agree. Whereas, if I start doing the dishes, focusing on cleaning up and other things, I don't think about my breathing, but I start breathing normally anyway and don't think about the panic attack. I calm down faster and the panic attack goes away.

In the beginning, I also had medication that I took to help me- one pill when the attack began if I was at home. I did not carry the medication with me, because I was not planning on relying on the medication forever. I knew that with mental training, I could overcome the panic attacks, because my psychiatrist told me I could. His faith in me, and my own faith in myself combined, and now, I do not need the medication. Even if I am not at home- when I am out and about and a panic attack strikes, I simply focus on doing something, shopping, driving, even talking, and eventually I am ok again.

Once you figure out what works for you, you can overcome your panic attacks. They are NOT insurmountable. Have faith in yourself, and use the resources that you have, and you'll be ok again, too.