Converting from City Life to Country Life

So you're a city boy or ghetto girl and you're moving to the country. Well, needless to say, you probably have some qualms about this and would like some advice.

Clothing. The first thing you need to do is evaluate your wardrobe. You will be buying a lot more than you'll be throwing away, actually. It's not that country folks don't wear high heels or dress up in city-style, but they don't do it every day. Keep your nice shoes and your cashmere coats, and then make a few extra purchases. You'll need casual tennis shoes (or sneakers, as you might call them), good work boots for sloshing around through the mud, and snow boots for sloshing around in winter. Next, you'll need about 20 pairs of good, strong jeans which fit you well. No low-riders or bedazzled pairs, since you don't want to have to think about pulling something up while you're working, or mussing up a pretty pair which you like. Country folks don't skimp on their jeans, so don't find everything at the thrift store, though that is a good place to start if you're on a small budget. You'll also need something more than a layered t-shirt which comes in very thin material. Invest in some basic, 100% cotton t-shirts, and a good number of long-sleeved shirts. Lastly, you'll need three or four high quality coats. We're not looking for fashion here, so don't get a fur-lined coat as your warmest coat. Out in the country, there are no buildings to block the high winds and sideways rain. Have a light jacket, a strong, leather coat, a long trench-coat, and a heavy, fur-lined winter coat, preferably ankle-length as well.

Social Graces. Country folks are known for their hospitality, but they're also known for being independent. You won't learn how to survive on your own right away, so accept the hospitality with full gratitude and learn the independence as you go along. Don't be too stubborn to ask for help. Give back when you can, but only when you have extra to give, so that you're not cutting yourself too short and putting yourself in need of asking for even more help. Be warm, light-hearted and tolerant. Show your neighbors and new friends that you'd really like to learn how they do things, and they will welcome you with open arms and hearts. After you're settled, practice being neighborly by inviting people over for a home-cooked meal, and visit neighbors when they're sick, bringing hot, fresh cooking along with you. Be positive and uplifting at all times, developing a kind and loving reputation. In the city, reputation can change overnight, but things a bit slower in the countryside, and they travel a lot further. If you're a whore, there will be no soul who doesn't know about it, and if you're a generous benefactor, every single person will stick up for you if your name should appear in the blame game. Keep your reputation tight and waterproof at all times.

Enjoyment of the Countryside. One of the greatest benefits to living in the country is the peace, the quiet and the landscape. Don't forget to let the outdoors fill your spirit by stargazing at night, sunbathing during the day, and spending free afternoons on the front porch, reading a good book and drinking iced tea. Setting aside time to do each of these things will be better than the most beautiful music, sweeter than the most delectable morsel. Country life can change you, and heal you, in ways that city life cannot. Life exists outside of the home; life which isn't human. Let the solitude and peace in, and you'll love living in the country in no time at all.

Toughing it. Inevitably, there will be a snowstorm or a thunderstorm or an encounter with a wild animal which may cause you to question your decision to live in the country. The key is to be around other people when these events occur, to watch their reactions and learn what is actually dangerous and what is not. Certain snakes are completely harmless, while others are extremely poisonous. Some snowstorms will blanket the world in a lovely, soft quilt, and some will rip out new growth, break down trees and cause you to be snowed in for days, sometimes even weeks. The key is to watch the weather, keep in contact with your neighbors (especially to avoid feeling lonely at first), and to ask a lot of questions. They have all lived through this before, some for several generations. Let them teach you what is good and what is worrisome.

Living in the country is an enchanting experience. Some people feel that it brings you closer to God, and I am not in a position to disagree with that prophecy. Learning self-sufficiency and independence is vital to human happiness, and country life instills these into you no matter how hard you try to stop it. Let nature take its course, and enjoy the stars at night.