Coping with Depression - How I Won the Battle

In the summer of 1987 I was diagnosed with having a clinical depression, a chemical imbalance in the brain where neurotransmitters don't have the proper "fuel" to carry electrical impulses from one cell to the next. In later years an anxiety disorder was added to the diagnosis making for one hell of a mental problem.

It took me a long time to accept that I had anything wrong with me. Twenty years in fact. It wasn't until an attempted suicide attempt this past November that I finally hit my proverbial rock bottom, landing myself in county jail. I spent most of my life running from my illness, with a cycle of going on again off again my prescribed medications, despite the realization that I felt better, acted better and thought better when I remained on my meds.

I don't really know the reason I kept having periods of my life where I went off of them. There were plenty of excuses, but no real reason. Perhaps I wanted to feel normal. I didn't want to be a slave to a little pill or I didn't want that little pill to control me. I sure as hell didn't want the "down" feelings that I was putting myself through and I knew that that little pill would help me avoid those low periods, I just didn't accept it fully.

It's not a type of "regular" depression that you could just snap out of, it was something far worse than that. This depression lasted for days, weeks, months until I finally was hospitalized and stabilized once again on an anti-depressant. This has been my cycle for the last twenty years and I have been hospitalized with this more time than I care to think about. What I finally realized was that I was not the only person feeling and acting this way.

The first step in fighting depression is to realize what it is and what's happening to you. Anyone is susceptible to getting depression. It doesn't distinguish age, race, financial status or what zodiac sign you were born under. Some of the more common symptoms of depression include disturbed and restless sleep, tearfulness, change in appetite, weight loss or gain, problems concentrating and decision making problems, loss of interest in things, decreased energy level and thought of death and suicide. If you experience any of these symptoms for an extended period of time, consult a physician immediately.

Family and friends can react many different ways when they discover that their friend and loved one has depression. They may respond with love, understanding and kindness. They may also pull away because they don't understand what depression is. The important thing here is to find a support system that will help you and not make you feel like a freak. Your doctor can help by finding support groups in your area. People fail to realize that depression can cause so many problems in a person's life as well as their family's life.

There can be several contributing factors for depression ranging from environment, medical conditions and genetics to a reaction to life's events and thinking patterns. Social conditions can play a major role in a person's depression. Poverty, homelessness and community violence can be as much a contributing factor as well as any biological problems.

As stated above, depression involves chemicals in the brain called neurotransmitters that help in transmitting message to your brain cells. Neurotransmitters regulate mood and can affect the way a person handles stressful life events. You can have a certain type of depression that is very intense and can last for weeks at a time or your depression can be less severe but lasts for years . This type of depression is called dysthymia and is the more common of the two.

There is a third, more temporary type of depression caused by certain events in life called adjustment disorder with depressed mood. This was very common after 9/11. Events such as death of a loved one and divorce can also trigger this type of depression.

Treating depression can be tricky. You may have to try several different medications until you find the right medication or combination of medications for you. Also, medications can take up to four weeks before you experience the effects and benefits. It is vitally important to stay on your medication regimen and never stop taking them without first discussing it with your doctor. Side effects can be part of the problem and your doctor can prescribe another type of drug that may work out better.

Psychotherapy, also called "talk therapy" can be quite effective, especially when used in conjunction with medication therapy. Short term therapy has become more popular and might be just what you need to get you through a bad situation. There are several types of talk therapy and they include:

Cognitive behavioral therapy which can help you identify and change behavior patterns that can contribute to your depression.

Interpersonal therapy where depression is discussed about how it is affecting your relationships and life.

Psychodynamic therapy links depression to certain traumas in life.

Group therapy allows you and others with depression to share and support each other in handling the illness.

It is important to create your own personal depression treatment plan with your doctor. Be proactive in you approach to you illness and you will have no need to suffer as I have for so long. Keep a journal of how and what you feel. This can be extremely helpful in your recovery. Stay motivated in your recovery any way you can. Don't isolate yourself or your feelings.

Depression can be a lifelong, life changing illness and the sooner you accept that fact the better off you will be.