Coping with the Loss of a Pet

Pets are family members. As we care for our pets, loving and providing for them, our relationship with them grows until they are no longer just an animal, but a true member of the family and a very real part of our lives. It stands to reason, then, that losing a pet is a very real loss--an emotional upheaval. The grieving process that a person goes through as they mourn the loss of a beloved pet is very similar to that of losing any loved one. Where there once was love, there is now an emptiness. It's a real pain, and a lasting one. It can be difficult to move on after losing something that was such a large part of your life.

The first step in coping with the loss of a pet is to recognize that your loss is real. You may encounter people who will trivialize your loss. They may tell you that you can always get another pet. As we pet lovers know, bringing another animal into your home does not replace the bond that you shared with your pet. Let yourself mourn. It's okay to feel that pain. It is normal. Give yourself time to let that gamut of feelings run its course.

Once you feel that you are ready, the time has come to begin to mend the rift in your life. Many pet owners find that memorializing their lost loved ones helps them to heal and move forward. There are many ways that this can be accomplished. Setting up a memorial service--even if you are the only one in attendance--allows you to celebrate the life of your pet, reminiscing about the good times you had and the happiness you shared. Talk to others who have lost pets. There are many support groups for those who have recently lost pets. These people understand your pain, and talking it through with a group of like-minded people can be very therapeutic.

You may wish to create a memorial book--a photographic storybook that you can look back on when you're missing your animal the most. A personalized headstone for your pet's grave site--if you've chosen a burial--or customized plate engraving--if you've chosen cremation--can help you feel as though you've paid homage to your lost friend. Whichever outlet you choose, it's important in the healing process to find a way that allows you to structure your raw pain and your real loss into something concrete.

There will come a time when you realize that you are at peace with the loss of your pet. The time line is different for each individual. It could be days, weeks, months, or even years. Don't make it harder than it has to be. Use the tools and outlets at your disposal. Let yourself feel the pain, but don't let it consume you. One day, you just may be ready to share your heart with a new pet.