Coping Mechanisms for Post-Partum Depression

I had post-partum depression after my son was born. And I take medication - an anti-depressant - every day as one of the ways that I help myself deal with it. There, I said it. Not many women will - not enough in my book - but that's another story for another time.

According to Wikipedia, post-partum depression is a form of clinical depression that affects approximately 5%-25% of all women and some men following childbirth. As with any depression, many times women suffer from low self-esteem, hopelessness, guilt and an inability to be comforted, among other things. Perhaps the most tragic and most important negative impact that post-partum depression can have on a family is the impact that it has on a mother's (or father's) ability to bond with the baby. A parent that suffers from this type of depression may feel unable to care for a child, thereby inhibiting bonding with that child. The link to the article cited can be found in the resources section following this article

I experienced mild post-partum depression - it was nowhere near the sort of post-partum psychosis that women like Andrea Yates suffered from. But it was still an insanely strong force in my life. I have always had self-esteem issues and those were compounded in the early weeks of motherhood - I had no idea what I was doing and the sleep deprivation did not help at all. But I did a number of things and the top ten most successful coping mechanisms, for me, are listed below.

1. Exercise, exercise, exercise. I had an emergency c-section for my son. Once my doctor cleared me for exercise, I began walking or doing yoga daily. When my partner came home, he would gladly take the tyke for a few hours so that I could do my exercise. It's well worth investing in a babysitter or asking a friend to help out or doing some mall walking or walking around the neighborhood because it gets those endorphins going. There's nothing like natural anti-depressants to scare the depression away.
2. Get out of bed, take a shower and get dressed for the day. You would be surprised how refreshed and better you feel simply by taking a shower and getting out of the PJ's.
3. Get out of the house, even if you're just running to your local pharmacy or grocery store to get painkillers and menstrual pads. Staying cooped up in the house made me feel so completely isolated from everyone and everything. Plus, the vitamin B is really helpful too!
4. Talk to people, preferably other new mothers. The feeling of isolation that new moms feel can intensify feelings of hopelessness - it sure did for me - so talking to other folks via the internet, new mom's groups and the telephone was really helpful. It made me realize that I wasn't alone.
5. Talk to your doctors and therapists (if you have one) about your feelings. They are there to help you and want to make sure that you're feeling well. They also want to make sure the baby is doing well also. I started talking to all of my providers, from the nurses that helped me when I was recovering to the lactation consultants to my attending obstetrician and the pediatrician. They were all very, very supportive and my obstetrician was the one that suggested a very low dosage of anti-depressant to start me off. I also found a wonderful therapist that helped me work through the angst of being a first time mother.
6. Be kind to yourself, if you can. This means giving yourself permission to cry when you need to and to sleep through a feeding or two. Believe me, the sleep will help aid with the feelings of hopelessness and will aid in a more swift recovery.
7. Improve how often (or how less!) you eat and what you eat. It's amazing how what we put into our bodies can impact how we feel. Healthier foods led me to healthier mental health. Interestingly enough, I craved fish (especially sushi!!!) during the weeks following the birth of my son. Little did I know that fish is one of the foods that doctors and holistic practitioners recommend to women that have post-partum depression because it is supposed to help combat the post-partum depression.
8. Get those feelings out! I found myself journaling whenever I could during those first few months. I would spend 30 minutes or more writing about my feelings so that they weren't bottled up.
9. Honesty is the best policy, even in matters of post partum depression and childcare. If someone is doing something that bothers you or isn't doing enough to help you, don't keep it in. Just say it!
10. Learn to forgive yourself! This was the hardest for me and I still struggle with this, daily. I am a perfectionist. I want to be a perfect mom. I wanted to be that mom that breastfeed easily, without thinking twice. I didn't want to have a c-section or use medications. And it didn't happen that way. I still make mistakes. But you know what, that's ok. I'm not perfect and neither are you. But your child still loves you. And mine loves me. I'm just trying to be the best that I can be and it's ok if I make a mistake.

If you think that you may be suffering from Post-partum depression, it is so important that you contact your doctor immediately. This depression has a huge impact, not only on you but on your family and child. I hope that these help and, please, please, please, contact me if you want to talk about what you're feeling!