Coping Skills for Caregivers

1.) Be honest. What we think, we believe. Our minds are tricky places, so the first thing to do, is be honest with yourself. We might be tempted to tell ourselves that everything is cool. That thisis is easy. That ther are no problems. That we can handle this. The more we lie to ourselves, the worse the situation seems. Be honest. Say it out loud, this sucks!

2.) Take a breather. Do something that you enjoy. I used to work in my garden when my mom was in her room, resting. It worked wonders!! It doesn't matter what it is, reading, knitting, taking walks, or gardening. Just do it. Take time out for yourself.

3.) Get out of the house. It could be a patio, or a porch, anything that is outside. Make time to get out of the house. If it is possible, take a bike ride around the neighborhood, or a little stroll down the block. If you have a dog, take it for a walk, or toss a ball in the backyard.

4.) Get rid of the guilt that is not helpful. Check your thoughts. If you are telling yourself things like, I'm not a good caregiver, I could be doing this better. STOP! Taking on the caregiver role, in itself, is an indication of what a great person you are. Instead of the negative guilt, find ways to make your guilt work for you. For example, if things aren't going well,figure out ways to make the days run smoother.

5.) Get organized. Organize the closets and dressers. Keep things in order. Your loved ones feel much more secure when their items are in place and they know where to find them, Keep things routine as well. One of things that I found extremely helpful, was to keep a large calendar on the wall, in my mom's room. I wrote down all activities and appointments, that we had scheduled. This way, she knew what was going on every day and at what time.

One advice, that I received from the administrator at the Adult Daycare facility I took my mom to, was take care of yourself. She told me that every time she saw me. As she put it, you won't be any good to your mom, if you don't take care of yourself and end up getting sick.