Cosmetic Surgery: What Will They Say?

When considering cosmetic surgery, you may run into a wide variety of responses from well-meaning friends and family members. How do you know when and where you should draw the line?

A few years ago I had scheduled a major facial laser peel to be performed at a plastic surgeon's office. The kind of laser peel that I would be having basically takes off the top few layers of your skin along with your nerve endings. I would be sedated for the procedure, have to be bandaged up, and medicated for a few days as well. I came to this decision after over 10 years of struggling with acne and acne medications. My problem was not just with the acne itself, but with all of the scarring my fair skin had accumulated through the years. I had done my research. I knew the pros and cons of my procedure. I was ready.

I'm not sure that I thought much about what others' reactions would be to my plans for cosmetic surgery. I just wanted it done for myself. I suppose I imagined that my friends and family members would all be just as happy as they could be for me. I assumed they would be thrilled that this would help me feel better about myself. I also imagined they were probably as tired of seeing my nasty skin as I was. Or at least tired of me wearing so much damn makeup to try to hide it. I was in for a real eye-opener.

Some people were supportive of my decision to undergo cosmetic surgery, if maybe a little concerned about safety issues, cost, and the like. There were those, however, who questioned my motivations. They tried, with the best of intentions I'm sure, to make me feel like I didn't need any cosmetic surgery. They thought I looked "fine" and why should I spend that kind of money? "We love you for who you are, not what you look like on the outside." It is noteworthy that the people who said these things were invariably those with milky soft, flawless skin. Of course, they had no idea what I went through on a daily basis.

One well-intentioned friend told me all about the wonderful "pancake" makeup available. These are specially created for severe burn victims, etc. Thank you, but I don't want to wear pancake makeup for the rest of my life. It's bad enough wearing a couple of layers of regular makeup every day.

My fellow Christian friends were especially critical. Certainly, I should not be concerned with all of this vanity stuff. They would say things like, "God made you the way you are, and you should be thankful for all of the wonderful things in your life and not worry about looking 'perfect' anyways." It's not like I was Sick, or Injured, or Deformed. (Who said anything about trying to look 'perfect' anyway?) If I thought that I just looked bad, that is really nothing to complain about, now is it?

Is it? Yes, I certainly was thankful for my health and the overall "normalcy" in my life. But am I not allowed to feel discouraged about my terrible skin? Does cosmetic surgery have to be considered vanity unless I've been in a terrible accident? Maybe I was a survivor of a decade-long, slow-moving acne accident. Does that count?

How is this so different from putting braces on your children's teeth? Our society practically expects us to do this to "fix" our children's teeth, but didn't God make them crooked as well? Isn't that purely vanity? I really don't think cosmetic surgery is any different. I realize, some people have made cosmetic surgery a life-long addiction, and I am certainly not condoning these "perfection" searches.

I do wonder, however, where I would draw the line. While waiting in my cosmetic surgeon's office, I picked up a couple of pamphlets on breast lifts and Botox injections. I haven't acted on either of those yet. But I certainly won't rule them out as the years accumulate on the rest of my body.

I am happy to say that I went ahead with my cosmetic surgery, and have been quite pleased with the results. As the healing process continued over the next several months, I slowly became more and more confident about the face looking back at me from the mirror every morning. And I was able to wear less and less makeup. My skin will never be perfect, but I am quite happy with my decision. If you are considering cosmetic surgery, listen to your own heart and not to those critical voices that may crop up around you.