Couples Quiz: Can You Trust Your Partner?
Questions of Trust Require Honest Soul Searching
If you're feeling uneasy about the level of trust in your relationship, ask yourself the following questions:
Is the problem that your partner is not trustworthy, or is it that you are unable to trust?
Herein lies the root of the problem with trust. It bears repeating because this is a very important distinction. Is the problem that your partner is not trustworthy, or is it that you are unable to trust? If you're not sure how to answer this, continue on.
How do you know if you can trust your partner?
Like all emotions, trust is a world of cliches. The first and most obvious cliche is: "If you think you can't trust your partner, you can't trust your partner."
Are you uneasy with the level of trust you have with your partner? Read on to determine if your feelings are validated.
Some people are liars. They do not deserve trust because they have acted without honor and without integrity. Does that describe your partner?
Is your partner a proven liar?
If so, your partner has betrayed your trust. It's a little like the Humpty-Dumpty cliche, ending with "...couldn't put Humpty together again." Sometimes our partners ruin things in a way that can never be truly fixed. (Even if we still want to hump them.)
The prior scenario is completely logical. If you had 100% trust, why would you question it? But sometimes the liar isn't the betrayer, sometimes the liar is the accuser.So let's go deeper by adding another cliche. "It's not you, it's me."
Are you able to trust?
Some people are overly suspicious. They constantly keep their guard up to avoid being hurt. They will always doubt whatever's told to them. They believe deep in their hearts that it's only a matter of time before their partner betrays them. Does this describe you?
Are you positive that your partner would never (and could never) earn your trust?
If so, perhaps you are the one with trust issues. And just to prove it you choose partners who are clearly not trustworthy. And then you get overly emotional when that becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. Or you falsely accuse your partner of being untrustworthy, which eventually leads to the end of the relationship.
Trust can make or break a relationship. If you're questioning the trust in your relationship, take the first step by being honest with yourself.
Published by Kay Whittenhauer
Kay Whittenhauer resides in Rochester, NY, with her husband, their teenage son, and a rambunctious dog of mysterious pedigree. She works year-round as an office administrator at a non-profit organization and... View profile
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13 Comments
Post a CommentThis is a great piece for couples to read before they actually get married although it is also useful once in a committed relationship as well. Great job!
I liked this topic and I think it's definitely one that needs to be answered before people get married.
That was a great topic and you covered it really well. Giggled at the *even if you still want to hump them* line. :)
Excellent piece. I think that a lot of people don't understand that trust issues go both ways. Thanks for sharing. :)
Great article. I spit out my water when I read your Humpty Dumpty analogy - you made my morning!
Very good points - I'd never thought of it that way. Maybe some people just aren't able to trust others.
Good article, Kay. My husband and I have implicit trust in one another, so trust has not been an issue in our marriage. I would find it hard to be married to someone I could not trust.
Sophie
Didn't get notified yet again, Kay! I love how you handle sensitive issues with a touch of humor!
So sorry, Kay...I have not been getting published notices and I am making my way around to catch up! I love the idea of this article! Funny how this made me look at trust in a whole new light!
What areally unique idea for an article, I really enjoyed this very nice!! I did not get notice either.