CP Spotlight: Lee "Meatsmoker" Andrew

Lee Andrew's presence is felt on the Associated Content forums. While he is only a burgeoning writer, he offers shrewd insight into the craft. He has a style that is intellectual without being condescending. He also makes his presence felt with his stinging sense of humor. He has the ability to slacken cold, sagacious conversations with a much-needed dose of levity. Lee mainly writes about sports, but he has also contributed entertaining reads on movies, video games, and Thanksgiving. His versatility is a preponderant trait in an age of niche writers. While driving to my grandmother's house this past weekend, I accidentally hit him with my car. His body was propelled into the air and into a dumpster.

I ran over to him to see if he was okay. His hands seemed to be twisted all the way around, but he insisted that it wasn't a big deal. What a stand-up fellow. I offered to drive him to the hospital. On the way there, I asked him a series of questions. It was difficult for him to answer them all, what with his teeth being lodged into his skull, but he trooped on. You could almost say that he is a trooper. After interviewing him, I'm convinced that he is the best writer on AC that happens to use his account. Here is what he had to say…

Dom Coccaro: Which public enemy is fouler? Osama Bin Laden or orange juice pulp?

Lee Andrew: I dislike Osama Bin Laden as much as the next guy, but he's only been around for like 50 years.
Oranges
have always existed and so has their pulp. In fact, the reason there is sin in this world in the first place is because Adam and Eve ate fruit from the forbidden tree. A lot of people think they ate an apple, but the Bible just says fruit and I believe that fruit was an orange.

DC: You specialize in sports. Have you written for any sports magazines? If not, have you thought of submitting content to a sports publication such as Penthouse or Home and Garden?

LA: I've really only been trying to get a writing job for a few months, so I haven't sent anything to any sport magazines quite yet. Would I write for Penthouse? Absolutely. Home and Garden not so much. I mean, come on. We know nobody reads the articles in Home and Garden, they only look at the pictures.

DC: How do you deal with writer's block?

LA: I've found the way to deal with writer's block is to plagiarize someone else's idea. In fact, right after this interview I'm going to steal your idea and interview myself.

DC: Do you find that writing for Associated Content sharpens your skills?

LA: Oh sure. I know some people think we get pretty low offers, but because of the low offers, I've learned to write an article faster in order to get more done in a day. If I ever got paid to do a weekly column or even a daily column, it would be a breeze because I already come up with 3 or 4 articles a day now.

DC: Who is your favorite CP?

LA: Well my mom, Barbara Henderson, has signed up but hasn't written anything and my sister, Heather Bermingham, is a CP too, and she has written some. But if you're talking non-family members, then it would be "The Man They Call L-Mo." I especially like his article about the Alabama State Constitution which has 777 Amendments.

DC: Would the Kansas City Royals stand a better chance of making the postseason if the players were replaced by disabled children?

LA: That's a good question. I'd like to think the Royals are better than disabled children but the disabled children would certainly make the Royals more money, then they could sign one big free agent and be on their way.

DC: As a freelance writer, do you feel any pressure to churn out "mainstream" content?

LA: Not as of yet. I guess the good thing about freelance writing is getting to choose what assignments to do. But if I was ever pressured to do so, I'm not sure I'd care that much. As long as I have work, it doesn't matter to me what I have to write about.

DC: Sum up your AC experience in three words.

LA: Sweep the leg! But if you don't know what that means, then I can't tell you.

DC: Any advice for budding writers?

LA: Try writing through the night instead of during the day, I find it easier, it's more peaceful.

DC: You just released a "greatest hits" album. What was it like working with Smokey Robinson and Ruben Studdard on your jazzy cover of Black Sabbath's "Paranoid"?

LA: Well it started out great, me and Ruben were chillin' and having a good time. We're both from
Birmingham, AL
so we had a lot in common. Then Smokey arrived and our manager introduced him to Ruben, but Ruben thought he said Smoked Robinson and well, we all know how much Ruben likes his smoked meats. It wasn't a pretty sight. It was effective though, I was definitely in a "Paranoid" frame of mind.