Creative Christmas Traditions: Barbecued Hamburgers and "Pink Stuff" for Christmas Dinner?

Traditional Christmas dinner, from what I've been told, usually involves a ham or a turkey. I say "from what I've been told," because in my family, for as long as I can remember, traditional Christmas dinner is barbequed hamburgers. Add chips, salad, the ever-present "pink stuff," and whatever other dishes family members have contributed, and it seems more like a Fourth of July picnic than Christmas dinner. We live in the Midwest, so an actual picnic is typically out of the question in December, but it really does seem to make Christmas quite a bit warmer.

I'm not certain how the tradition of barbequed hamburgers for Christmas dinner started. All I know is that when my mom's side of the family gets together, we always have this meal. I suspect that part of the reasoning may be that the preparation of a Christmas ham or turkey is long and complex, and would involve my mom being in the kitchen for a good portion of the day, even if the bulk of that is before the relatives arrive. With hamburgers, she can make them up a day in advance, and then one of my uncles can be in charge of putting them on the grill and making sure they are well cooked. This gives my mom a chance to focus on the other parts of the meal, or socialize with our relatives. Usually, she gets to do a whole lot more of the latter, as most of the rest of the meal can be made up the day before. It's a solution that works well for everyone involved: our whole family likes the barbequed hamburgers, my uncles like to grill, and my mom likes to get a chance to relax during the holidays.

"Pink stuff" is another family tradition with origins lost to the sands of time, but I can tell you this much: "pink stuff" is not necessarily pink. This fact alone has baffled more outside observers of my family than can be counted. "Pink stuff" involves a tub of Cool Whip, a small container of cottage cheese, a drained can of crushed pineapple, and a package of Jell-O (not prepared in the traditional manner). When I explain this recipe to people, a lot of them want to call it "Jell-O salad," but I insist that it's pink stuff. The Jell-O mix is what gives it whatever color it has. Pink (usually cherry) and green (lime) tend to be the most typical colors, but I prefer orange or pineapple Jell-O when I make my own. "Pink stuff" is not strictly reserved for Christmas dinner in our family; pretty much any time we gather, there will be "pink stuff." This includes my middle sister's wedding, when the "pink stuff" was purple (grape) in order to match the bridesmaids' dresses. It tasted awful. Pineapple and grape don't go well together.

So while everyone else I know is sitting around eating their Christmas ham, or perhaps their second turkey in as many months, I'll be enjoying my barbequed hamburger, chips, and "pink stuff." And then, after we open up all of our Christmas gifts, there will be another installment of the Great Wrapping Paper Fight. But that's another story entirely.