Dad Gets an IPod

Much like the Queen of England, I was recently gifted an iPod. The kids chipped in for it. This is a pretty big deal for me because I was never one of those Walkman/Discman/radio-headset kind of people. I usually got by with humming. And sometimes the voices in my head would sing along. But it a very nice gift and I was truly happy to receive it.

It's an amazing piece of technology, a song player that can fit in the palm of your hand and plugs directly into your ears. Although, if the people who invented this and keep rolling out new versions are so smart, how come they can't figure out what to do with the stupid wire that comes with it?

It's a great companion for long commutes and jogging (one of which I do). But here's the thing; the iPod comes empty. I have to fill it up. And this is tricky. I own all of two CDs. Again, I'm not really a big audiophile. So now, I'm on a quest to put songs in this thing. A lot of songs. What's the point of having an iPod if you're only going to listen to the same dozen songs over and over? If I wanted to do that, I would just turn on the radio.

Not for nothing but the last time I bought music for myself it came on tape. No, not eight track. Shut up. And I have a bunch of vinyl albums packed away somewhere that survived the Great Rap DJ-Record Scratching of 1995. These are songs I wouldn't mind listening to on a regular basis but you need a way to load this stuff into a computer. Not so easy. Fortunately, I've been messing around with my videos and moviemaking and have some of the software to do this. You have to get a device to interface your PC, play it, load it, convert it, label it, import it and find the artwork to attach to it. Basically, loading my iPod has become a full time job, with even worse medical than my day job.

During one of my longer stint at the computer, my kids pointed out that all these songs are online and they're only 99 cents and I can download it one-two-three. But excuse me: I'm not about to pay for songs I already own. That's absurd, right? Absolutely. But after midnight, sitting at the computer trying to lose the bass distortion on my transfer of "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun," 99 cents per song is starting to look good. So I start checking out some of the sites that sell music. There's a lot of music out there. Then I realize; this thing holds a thousand songs! That's a thousand dollars! My car isn't worth a thousand dollars! I'll crack this bass distortion problem yet!

So, returning to my objective of filling the iPod on the cheap, I decided to scan the PC to see if there are any songs there. My kids have been using our computer for awhile now and they're constantly downloading things onto it. I have the viruses to prove it. So there must be some residual music there. There is! Aqua's "Barbie Girl?" Sure, why not? Spice Girls? I heard somewhere that they're popular again, so that makes them hip, in a retro kind of way, so "Wannabe" is in. I grab "Skater Boi" even though she misspelled "boy." Slowly but surely a catalog comes together on my iTunes software. Oh, right, you see, once you get an iPod, you have to download the iTunes software onto your computer so your iPod can talk to your PC and they can both mock you while you're waiting for a download.

It was somewhere along this point I realized something; I've been saving those soda cap points! They can be traded in for music downloads! Score. Free music for me. I don't know why I was saving them. Something to do, I guess. It was a way to get a t-shirt or an American Idol souvenir cup. Maybe I thought I'd give them to my kids. But the heck with them, I have an iPod to fill now.

Now comes the hard part. What songs? What are the songs I've heard in my life that still give me a thrill? What songs that perk me up when I hear them, songs that still make me smile? Songs I won't mind hearing repeatedly. It's an eclectic group. Broadway tunes, Beatles, novelty songs, Randy Newman, the songs from Charlie Brown. Movie soundtracks are great. When I do buy a song, I like downloading very long songs like "American Pie," "Rhapsody in Blue" or anything by Harry Chapin because I feel like I'm getting more for my money.

Now my life has a soundtrack. When I have to run to make the train, I punch up the theme from "Back to the Future." Riding the Ferry? Theme from "Titanic." Walking along the sidewalk? "Linus and Lucy." My next idea is to hire Morgan Freeman to record narration tracks for me and while I'm sitting around and pondering, Morgan Freeman's voice comes up and narrates what's going on, like he does in all his movies.

In the end, I'm enjoying my iPod every much. It's mode of entertainment as well as a hobby that eats up a ton of time. After I finish up my Halloween mix-tape, I'm going to build an iPod in a bottle.