Dancing Lessons: Without the Stars

If you are a fan of the TV show that has brought professional-style dancing back to public attention, you'll understand why, some years ago, I wanted to learn to dance. Dancing is a beautiful and graceful skill. It is also romantic, fashionable and a pretty good cardio workout. Dancing is fun. At least most women think so. It's harder to convince the guys except when their wedding day is approaching and they know they'll be in the spotlight for that "first dance". Then their fear of looking like a tree trunk in dress shoes - before they've had enough beer not to care - kicks in. But that wasn't my concern. I just wanted to learn to dance for myself. Dancing was on my Life List.

The studio where I went for lessons was owned and operated by four-time US Professional Theatrical Arts Champions Tim and Barbara Haller. Glorious to watch when they were practicing, it was also flattering to have their attention while attending classes and group functions. The couple ran a very lively dance studio as well as a yearly talent production in which anyone could participate. All regular students could be part of the "chorus" as well as a group number in the recital. If you wanted to dance a solo piece with one of the instructors, or your own dance partner, you had to sign up for extensive costly lessons to get prepared. That little detail kept them in business and me from participating in the show.

Meanwhile, it was an education to attend dance class.

First of all, many of the teachers were European born and had come to the US after achieving some sort of prestigious dance status overseas. Evidently the US presented them with more lucrative opportunities and that was why they had relocated. It didn't matter to me. I was thrilled by the personal attention I got from the teachers who had such delightful foreign accents. I was so pleased when a particular instructor sought me out to dance the waltz while another paired up with me for a lively Swing. My main reaction was to giggle loudly and then concentrate as hard as I could to get the steps right. Fortunately, I do have a bit of rhythm and a good teacher makes it enjoyable. He knows how to lead you, charm you, draw you into the dance.

I have to admit that I was a bit taken aback on my first visit to the dance studio after signing up for extended lessons. I glimpsed my instructor walking off the floor with an attractive woman. They had their arms around each other's waists and they leaned their heads together in intimate conversation. I thought they must be real-life man and wife or at the very least, professional dance partners. I was wrong on both counts.

No ~ up and coming dance students get whatever attention they need to stay motivated and to keep paying for lessons. There is a sign in the lobby that provides a disclaimer concerning teachers becoming "involved" with students. It is strictly prohibited, but during lesson time, intimacy is the name of the game.

Obviously, to dance with someone, you must physically touch them. You need to be comfortable not only with your own body, but with the embracing contact of your dancing companion. He zigs, you zag, and that does not happen at a distance. I suspect that this is the most beguiling aspect of learning to dance. It is an unspoken but delicious condition of dancing with a partner. You are held closely, you maintain eye contact, you orbit around one another knowing that you will almost never be more than an arm's length apart. If you are, then there will be a dramatic coming-together to emphasize that you should never have left each other's side. Dance is sexual tension personified.

Then there's the music. Nothing evokes stronger emotion than music. The dance studio features a fine sound system and an extensive music collection because there is a dance style for every tempo imaginable. Ballroom. Foxtrot. Tango. Jive. Swing. Latin. Cha Cha. Waltz. Rumba. Samba. Hustle. Merengue. Mambo. Salsa. Men and women have naturally figured out every beat there is and how to move to it in a pleasurable way. Dance studios capitalize on that and your fascination with being able to dance - not your actual ability to do so.

After a while, you figure that out. Dance lessons are a commitment of time and money. If you truly love dance and want it to be part of your life, then you will enjoy being part of a dance studio community. There were couples at the group dances who had been attending for years. They just love to get dressed up and dance and want to mix with the pros. They were having a lot of fun.

I had fun, too, but for me, the cost and the time constraints outweighed the other factors. I got what I wanted from the experience: the feeling of dancing with someone who really knows how, an appreciation for the work and discipline it takes to dance, and another item on my Life List fulfilled.

Now when I watch Dancing With the Stars on television, I am not quick to judge or criticize. I know how hard it is to dance well and I'm glad I took some lessons. My dance shoes are still in the closet and I enjoy a look at them from time to time. Other than that, I'll leave all those rehearsal hours to the pros and the celebrities looking for a ratings boost. I've got my feet up, watching them on TV.