Date Nights: Do Marriages Need Them?

At the moment "date night" is a very popular idea. Couples are often encouraged to engage in date nights, especially after having children. While the idea to spend a little special time with your spouse is wonderful, it seems that so many folks have the notion that you have to go to a special place (usually out, and usually to spend some money) and that those are the only real bonding times you have. That somehow if you don't have date nights you are really missing out. Are "date nights" a must have to have a happy marriage? If so, how did people get along for the centuries before "date nights" became cool?

I doubt our parents and grandparents had "date nights". They just had every day moments where they connected with each other. Granted, it is tough to connect while cleaning up spilt milk at the dinner table. It is easy to let our busy lives and tiredness rule out real communication and fun. But special opportunities do present themselves. Look for one today.

For some couples, especially those with children it may be their routine to lay in bed talking until sleep comes. Or, they may enjoy sitting at the picnic table while the children play together. Some couples enjoy a good game of cards or scrabble. Hiking and fishing are also fun ways to spend time together without having to go out on a "real" date.

In the winter my husband and I sit out in the garage in front of our wood stove with a cup of hot coffee and share our hopes, dreams, and the cares of this life. We pray together, make plans for our future and encourage one another. In the summer time we do this out on the patio. We also spend an enjoyable day fishing now and then. It isn't what most people consider a "real" date, but it works for us.

The idea behind date night is to really enjoy being together and to strengthen the bonds of matrimony. Enjoying each other and strengthening your marriage is best done daily, moment by moment; not on one special date.