Dating Advice for Men: The Secrets for Relaxed Dating Revealed

The great thing about going on a date is that you already know that she is interested in you. At this point you can relax and see were things will go from here. The secret to dating success is that both parties should be in a state of relaxation. In fact, when people are worried or anxious they send blood from the brain to other muscles in the body. This is part of the fight or flight response. In pre-historic times people often came upon wild predators or enemies and the body evolved a mechanism where blood could be pumped to the muscles for quick jolts of speed and power.

Since most people do not live in such environments anymore, the fight or flight response has become somewhat counterproductive. The mind works best when it is in a heightened state of relaxation. It is at this point that the brain is fully oxygenated from the blood stream. In this state you are more witty, you can think faster, and your thinking is more methodical. This is the type of mental state that women are attracted to in a man. Women are seeking out men with stable personalities.

To remain in a calm state of mind it is best to be prepared for any circumstances. This requires that you spend some time planning out the date. During your conversations with your date, ask her what kind of food or entertainment she is into. Use this information to pick out at place to wine and dine ate. It is true that a number of women want men to take control and make decisions about where to go on the date. This shows women that you are able to take responsibility for planning events. Yet, you will want to plan out the night with her preferences in mind.

Before the date you will have to spend some time polishing your image. Women will be expecting that you have all of your details in order. Women are attracted to men who pay attention to the details. For instance, you will want to have spotless and wrinkle free clothes ready for you before you go out the door. Most likely you take good care of your hygiene and you work on your appearance before a date. However, it is said that men do not judge their appearance the same way that women do. Men will have to inspect themselves the same way that women do. It is said that a tiny speck of dandruff, a slight odor on one's breath, or oily skin can affect a woman's impression of him. This is why it is paramount that men pay attention to the details.

Another thing that you will need to do is prepare for any contingencies. You will want to bring some breath mints, a few tissues, aspirin, or anything that you think you may need during the night. You can keep these items in the care or in your pocket. The point is that women do not want to be left waiting at the table. Furthermore, it may become apparent that she needs a tissue or an aspirin, or whatever else you have in your repertoire. This shows that you are prepared and that you care about her needs as well.

Once crucial aspect of the date is the condition of the mans car. This is obvious to men and is a reason why men spend so much of their time and money improving their vehicles. If you car needs work on the engine, the interior, or the exterior then you would make a major improvement in the way she envisions you if you get the work done. What I want to point out is the degree to which women judge men by their cars. Usually a man's car is the first example of his financial status that a woman sees. This does not mean that you have to buy more car than you can afford but it does mean that the car you do have should be in the best condition possible.

Once you begin the date, things should progress on their own. If you feel that you have to struggle to maintain chemistry within the first hour or so then it may be a sign to cut the night short. If things are progressing smoothly then there are ways to make it work even better. Most women still prefer than a man display some form of chivalry or another. They expect men to open doors, pay for the meal, and any other courtesies which apply to the moment.

You can learn a lot about a woman on the first date. If she genuinely likes you and she is courteous then you know you are on the right track. If she orders the most expensive meal and the most expensive bottle of wine at the restaurant then it may be a sign that she is using you simply as a free meal ticket. This does not mean that you should discourage her from ordering top level items at the restaurant, but her behavior will give you clues about what she expects from you in a financial sense.

If the first destination of your date is a restaurant then you should spend a little time finding the restaurant that best provides the mood which you wish to set for the rest of the evening. You do not have to go to the most expensive restaurant in the area, and she should not expect this from you anyway. If she is not a vegetarian then you can proceed to a steak house. If she is into health foods you can go to a restaurant that caters such a type of food. The main point is that you want her to enjoy the night as much as possible. If she has her favorite food and she experiences great entertainment, she will ultimately link these emotions to your presence.

You should be controlling the date. Most women do not want to lead men around by the nose. They want a man who is respectful of her needs, yet in control of the situation. If the waiter asks you directly if there is anything else he can get you and your date, you would obviously look at her to see if she wants anything else. Little details like this seem like common sense, but often when we are out experiencing a good time we forget them.

You are probably aware of all of the common courtesies while you and your date are at the dinner table. Yet, we should cover a few of them just in case any of them slipped under the radar. Obviously, talking on the phone while in her presence is a bad move. Likewise if she is continuously talking on her cell phone while in your presence during the date, that is a sign that she is not considerate of you. Next, as stated before, you will not want to leave her waiting at the table. She will understand if you have to use the bathroom, but that is about as far as her patience will go.

The conversation should be a give and take situation. If either of you are talking much more than the other, there is an imbalance in the relationship. Of course, some people talk more than others, but it can be a sign that something is wrong if one of the parties is silent during the evening. On the flip side, if the man or the woman is talking too much, it is a sign that they are self absorbed.

The first date is an opportunity to see if you would like to go on a second date. It is a time to get to know a little bit about each other. It is the time to ask light personal questions, such asking her what kind of work does she do, asking her about her other interests, and other topics to keep the conversation going. Once the both of you have covered a topic at length, switch to another topic. Silence can be awkward during the first date. When two people are interested in each other, they can not get enough of each other. They have to know more about the other person. If she asks you a lot of questions then it is a sign that she wants to move closer to you on a personal level.

During the first date it is important to refrain from discussing hot button issues. A few of the topics that should not be discussed until late in the relationship are politics, religion, racial issues, and past relationships. The point is that she may either whole heartedly agree with you or she will vehemenently disagree with you. If she becomes angry at your opinion on a controversial topic, it may cause awkward silence for the rest of the night. These topics are better left for a time when you feel that the two of you can more openly discuss them.

If you had a great time during dinner, then the two of you can move on to other events for the night. If you choose to go to a movie, be highly selective in which movie you choose to see. Keep in mind that the tone of the movie can affect the tone for you and your date. The best types of movies to see on a first date are comedies; second would be scary movies. Comedies will put the both of you in a positive state. Scary movies will cause her to cling to you and increase the level of physical intimacy between the two of you. I would not recommend the recent trend of movies which contain purely horrific scenes unless you are sure that is what she is into. It is also not recommended that you see a sad drama on the first date.

Once the movie is over, you can go to a late night joint such as coffee shop, or you can call it a night. If you decide to wind the date down, there are a few things to consider. This is the crucial point in the night. Did she have a good time? Did you have a good time? Are the both of you physically attracted to each other? These factors will dictate how you spend the rest of the night?

Women will let you know when they want to get more intimate with you. Men make the mistake when they are paying attention to their male instinct more than to the signals the woman is sending herself. When a woman wants to get close to you or to kiss you she will do so. Generally you should have kissed her by the first or second date. If there is no semblance of physical intimacy between you then you will be chalked onto her "friends" list.

Now the closing part of the date is very important because it sets the tone for the rest of the relationship. Once again pay attention to her body language along with what she is saying to you. If she asks you to come inside to her apartment, by all means do so. So men have the misconception that is propagated by Hollywood that women want men who act like they have no interest in sex. This is flat out untrue. Women want men who like sex but they want to make sure that sex is not the only component of the relationship. If the date ends with a good kiss or further passion, then it is a sure sign that she will be expecting to see you again. If all she does is shake your hand while giving you little eye contact then it is obvious that further physical intimacy with you is not the first thing on her mind.