Dating: Should Men or Women Take the First Initiative?

Women should absolutely make the first move - leaving men less exposed to feeling rejected. Something that bothers me about some guys, is that you should like simply hanging out with your 'significant other', and if I'm seeing a guy who doesn't seem to enjoy simply hanging out with me (and seems to be in some great race against time to move 'things' forward) that's a huge red flag that the relationship will lack longevity, and will be more likely to be rocky.

I'm always surprised when a guy who I barely know (or who I have nothing in common with) asks me out! More surprising is when they seem to be surprised when they get a 'no'! I'm definitely not interested in spending an evening alone with someone that I feel no connection to! Chemistry is always an important component (and generally a foundation must) for someone to be truly interested in spending time alone with you outside of business/sports/etc.

Spending time alone with someone is not something to be taken lightly - especially since your time and efforts are valuable commodities and, as such, your friends/associates/dates should be well-chosen! Obviously we can't choose our family - but we can certainly choose our dates/boyfriends/girlfriends/husbands/wives, and when it comes to getting married, you should be beside yourself, hardly being able to wait to spend the rest of your life with your (well-chosen) partner!

Building a base of trust and respect, is a no-brainer way to convince someone that you are worth your weight in gold - and they should invest their time in you! What makes no sense, is to try to make someone feel guilty for not going out with you/or for resisting your confusing advances (I don't know who told people to try to get dates that way - but it's probably not going so well for them!). I always cringe when I see a guy hit on a girl and she looks at him like he's from outer space! The bottom line is that she's confused, and probably knows very little about the guy, and the idea of being anywhere alone with him is off-putting! Guys that do this need to start over from scratch and change the way that they interact with a girl that they may be interested in, so that the girl in question has a chance to become 'interested' in them also.

So guys - work on building respect and trust, and girls - let those eligible guys know you're in desperate need of a 'cinnamon dolce latte'!