Dating in Today's Society

It no longer starts off with a 'hello', 'where are you from?', or 'how are you?'. Instead it's a lewd sexual comment or perverted question. The dating world has changed since I last left it about 4 years ago. I am just exploring dating options after losing my husband to cancer last year, and what I have seen so far is plain scary.

I have predominantly stuck to online dating in the past, with some degree of success. But this new world of online dating has changed dramatically. Courtesy, manners and general civility has gone out the window and been replaced with perversion.

I don't want to place blame anywhere, I believe both sides are faulted. Women have lowered expectations, and men have stopped trying. It ranges from the 20 somethings to even our grandparents. The world of classy courting is gone, and it's quite disappointing.

What I expected of meeting new men in the past, included paying for checks, courteous conversation, picking up the tab, and so on. Now, I have witnessed men just forgetting general courtesy. Women seem to not even bother trying to put up a genteel front; instead they just give up right away for the first guy that even bothers to say 'hello'.

What has happened to the dating world? I miss the days of discovering something new about a person's personality rather than their underwear style. I realize that 4 years ago, dating wasn't that much different. I just chose not to put up with the men who were pigs.

These days though, it's impossible to find anyone who doesn't start off in a sexual manner immediately. Expectations are so low for the opposite sex, that everyone just gives up before we even begin.

How can we change the current dating introductions? I hate to say it, but it goes right back to plain old manners and courtesy for others, not to mention a little self respect.

Girls, put your chin up. We are beautiful, intelligent, classy women who are successful and independent. Do not demean yourself to become some inanimate sexual object. That just doesn't suit your style, trust me.

Men, you're handsome, worthy, self reliant beings who should be happy to treat any woman like you treat your mother and grandmother. You can start by opening doors, asking how her day is, and looking at her smile first instead of her chest.

It doesn't take much to make slight changes to become more worthwhile human beings. You just need to remember that not everything has to be physical anymore. Just being a good friend to start, building a personal relationship, and then moving forward can be the start of a great relationship. While the physical is nice, by starting things that way, it rarely turns into anything worthwhile.