Dayz of Caring

Today started as most. Dave and I were up about seven and got ourselves going. We then got Bob and Robbie ready for the day.

Bob was undressed--totally. Robbie had removed his pajamas and diaper. The clothes were neatly folded on the arm of the couch in the living room. The diaper had been deposited, unceremoniously in the shower. Upon asking, Robbie stated that she had undressed Bob so they could walk home--he could not wear his pajamas outside and he did not bring any clothes with him.

She laughed after reciting to me why he was going to have walk home naked.

I reminded her that he could no longer walk, as he only has one leg now. She responded by laughing and saying, "Oh well, I guess he'll have to sit in his wheelchair naked. I'll push him."

Note, they have lived in this house for many years. I tried, without success to remind her of that fact. She knows they bought this house and land but, "Honey, we don't live here."

It's all just conversation to try to pass the time and bring her back into the present, all the while knowing she has slipped the surly bonds of reality never to return.

After getting Bob cleaned up and dressed, I assist him with standing on the walker and transferring from his bed to the wheelchair. He wheels himself to the dining room table.

Breakfast is served with the one usual thing--Robbie constantly fussing at him. According to her he eats too slow, he coughs too much and he doesn't shave often enough.

Today she did not fuss for him go get her purse out of the car. A place she has not been in many months. She has days she all but demands he go get her purse so she can put her makeup on. We have had to take her makeup as she will dig in a new lipstick thinking its all gone. She puts lipstick under her eyes, on her arms, etc.

Another given on most days is that she complains that her hair is "stringy'. I happen to think she has very pretty white hair. It's a bit dry from all the coloring she done to it the past twenty years--see she had Alzheimer's for a very long time before any one knew and she would color her hair sometimes weekly, forgetting she had just done so.

Dave went to check the mail and I came in my room to change shirts. Bob was sitting at the table and Robbie was taking a nap. Next thing I knew, someone was trying to open my bedroom door. It was Bob, he needed to get on the pot and insisted that the pot was in this bedroom.

There never has been one in here and she has never let him in this room. When they bought this trailer her mother had passed several years before but she set this room up as "Mama's Room", she cared for her Mother for about twenty years.

I took him to their bedroom where there is a bedside commode and assisted him in getting on it, made sure he was positioned correctly and comfortably and sat the toilet paper within reach. I try to give him the dignity of privacy (semi) when he is on the pot.

Before I could get to the door he was hollering, "Hey! We need some service in here!" Upon asking, he did not know what he wanted and did not remember saying anything.

It was literally seconds between him hollering and my asking.

We get him cleaned up and sponge bathed all over, dressed and back in the wheelchair.

Bob likes sweets and I baked Peanut Butter Banana Bread. Bob enjoyed a piece of that with a glass of milk with a special thickener in it (to keep him from choking on it-goes in all liquids).

The day is over and they are both in bed--for the time being.

Dave and I will take turns checking on them every hour or so all night. We tried using a baby monitor in their room but Robbie has an obsession with unplugging EVERYTHING!

The day will start again early--then again does it ever really end?