Dear Abby Questions - Where Are You?

Hello everyone out there in pet cyberspace. I know, I know - many of you have been asking what's happening, why isn't 'Dear Abby' writing her 'Helping Han' column. That's a darn good question and I have an answer for you, just to keep y'all in the loop so you aren't worrying about me.

See, I'm just a lab - well I shouldn't say 'just' since I am 'the' lab where I live! My people think highly of me, as well they should. They know I'm a dog and I eat and poop just like any ol'pooch. But since I have this talent for helping people I feel sorta out of it by just lying around on the sofa all day eating gourmet dog biscuits. Life gets a little boring at times and I need to work, at least until the warm weather hits and I'm in the pool! You won't find me at the keyboard - once they put my tube in the water I'm history! I've got the sunscreen and towel ready and they just got me a new umbrella so I can have a nap in the shade poolside. What a life!

While it's still cold and raw and I need to keep busy so I have strolled over to the computer several times to search for any news from Han. Northing. I know there are dogs and cats out there that need my expert advice and I mean expert advice! You can't pay and get better advice. I have helped keep many a dog out of the shrink's office. You don't need a bunch of 'letters' after your name to help unless those letters are V E T.

For instance, let's say you are a Great Dane and your people don't give you enough attention and you don't know how to fix that. Simple, find the smallest hallway that your lady person uses to get from the living room to the food room or the water room - lay in that spot. Don't move. Stay right there. Eventually she will get the tired of tripping over you, bend down and give you a good ol'pat on the head.

That's your opportunity. Now that you have her full attention, use it to your full advantage...follow that human until you finally get what you want....give her that big "deer in the headlights" look and you will melt her heart - which will lead to a biscuit or even better, a rawhide bone...wow, my mouth is drooling just typing those two words - rawhide bone...yum, yum.

Now my concentration is gone, finished, done. I cannot and will not go on. When Han asks for help, I'll help but for now it is time to follow my own advice....I think I just heard footsteps in the hallway to the room where they keep that big water bowl that they use but won't let me drink out of...I hear the 'swish' of water - I have to go trip that human - catch ya later guys!

PS: If anyone sees Han, please tell him Abby is waiting on him....He is probably busy with all those little contest score cards he writes, think I'll drop him a note "Dear Helping Han....get on the stick - signed, Ask Abby Greenhill."

Source:

My human lady's creative mind