Dear Daughter

Tonight I watched you as you slept and my heart broke as your face relaxed in peaceful rest. In 6 weeks you will graduate from High School and your life will change forever. Two months after that you will turn 18 and the world will no longer consider you a child. But you will always be my baby.

The events of the last year rush through my head. I wanted this year to be so special. I intended to keep a journal of this, your Senior year. Then I had back surgery, and for the first two months of school, I could barely function on my own. The journal never got started, and I'd already missed so much, that I didn't even bother. Now, I wish I had.

So much has happened, just in the last 4 months. The bum that your dad and I thought was such a good guy, ended up to be a jerk. I wish it hadn't taken you getting hit, and hurt for us to realize that. I am so proud of you for breaking away from the relationship before he could hurt you further. I am extremely proud of you for having the guts to tell someone about it, perhaps it will keep some other woman's daughter from getting hit.

Your best friend has become the love of your life. Sometimes I still can't believe that he was right there beside you all the time. But perhaps the love and laughter you shared, just being friends, is what you needed as a foundation for a lifetime of love and laughter. We love Hunter and look forward to being able to call him son. His love for you is obvious to us each time we watch him...watching you.

Your decision to go ahead with your preschool certification, even when people are trying to discourage you makes my heart soar. You tell me you feel as though this is what God has for you, and are determined to follow His will, regardless of the amount of money it doesn't pay. I know that you will be blessed beyond what people can fathom, for listening to the call of the Father.

Baby Sister has become your friend and your confidant, and not just someone who sleeps in your room and annoys you. When her volleyball team won state, I saw the pride in your eyes, as she held up that trophy. When she put on shoes that didn't match her dress that she was wearing for lunch at the governor's mansion, you didn't berate her, you simply handed her a different pair and pointed to her feet. You helped her with her dress, her nails, her hair and her make-up, so that she was picture perfect for her first prom.

Big Brother is no longer just the boy who comes home from college every once in a while. He has become whispers and giggles on the phone as you tell him about Hunter's marriage proposal. You change his sheets when you know that he's going to be home for a few days, you offer to help him with his laundry, so that he can spend time with his friends while he's home. You love his girlfriend, even though you are afraid that she will one day take him away from you.

Daddy is still your best friend. The man who holds your hand during church, helps you up when you fall down, and wraps you in his arms when you cry. His eyes have misted over when that beautiful solitaire was placed on your finger by the young man who will take you away someday soon. And his heart knows that he is not really losing his little girl, but it hurts anyway. So he teases you and says you can't get married until you're 35.

And then, there's me. I remember the night you were born. When the doctor's laid you on my stomach, and you were so quiet and still and blue. I knew something was wrong when you didn't cry. The nurses told me that the cord had been around your neck, and you were without oxygen. They whisked you away without my getting to hold you. For over 18 hours, they kept you in the nursery amidst wires and monitors as they worked to make the fluid around your heart and lungs disapate, and to figure out if there was permanent damage to your heart.

For long hours, I saw nothing from your incubator when I would walk to the window. Your Aunt Pam and I prayed and asked God to show us that you were going to be ok. The next time we walked to the window, you were suddenly screaming your head off. I knew at that moment, that I had a fighter on my hands. For almost 18 years, you have shown that fighting spirit through each and every obstacle that has been thrown in your way.

So sleep now, dear Princess, for no one knows where your path may take you tomorrow. You need your strength for the journey.