Dear Martha

I just watched some home movies

from 12 short years ago.

I saw a woman different

from somethings I had been told

I wish I'd known you back then,

a more settled time of life

it seems by then you'd already passed

through most the hurt and strife.

I knew you didn't like me much,

you viewed me as a threat

we made each other laugh and cry,

sometimes, wished we'd never met

By then your illness started

to make it's claim on you

to rob you of your memories

and change your points of veiw

As time went on it seemed that we'd

just tolerate each other

sometimes at night I'd pray for more

sometimes I didn't bother

I only wanted us to share

the love we have for marty

it took so long to reach that point.

for that I'm truly sorry

I'm so gratetful to have known you,

so happy for the time

those final months too show you

my love for you defined

I tried to tend to all your needs

as if you were my own,

until the day I knew would come

that God would call you home

So everyday I prayed with you

sang christian songs of old.

in hopes you'd find and then re-light

the candle in your soul

Then in your final hours,

when I'd come into your room

I knew your time was coming

and you'd be gone too soon

Your breaths were quiet and easy

your brow and face relaxed,

I knew you finally found the peace

God promised in your past.

And when your final heartbeat,

softly kissed my cheek I knew

you realized I loved you

and I felt you loved me too

I knew the time was drawing near,

your death was imminent

yet I was not ready to say goodbye,

I was truly unprepared

The loss I feel is so profound,

the emptiness so great

it's left a whole within my heart,

that can never be replaced

I'm thankful for the life you led

the hardships, trials and fears

decisions made both right and wrong

the laughter and the tears

Every second in the passage of time

lays the path for lifes next twists

and had you changed a word or deed

how many might not exist

Cause in the end when we look back

at all that had been played

we know that had a moment changed

the ones here now would fade

So again I tell you Thank you

for all you've said and done

if you had gone a different path

I would not have your son

With the children you were blessed with

I know you did your best

we're here to learn and make mistakes

but only God can score our test

The grief and saddness suffered

by the ones you did depart

is only to remind us

that your still here in our heart

So be at peace and know your life

has served it's purpose well

God knew it from the very start

theres nothing left to tell

Love Donna