Death and Dying: The Bible's Perspective

Desiring to learn more about grief and bereavement, I investigated how the Bible deals with the subject. I discovered that people in biblical times dealt with death and dying much the same as we see today in our patients and their families.

The first grieving family that came to mind was King David and his mistress-turned-wife, Bathsheba. As a fellow bereaved parent, I can deeply empathize with the loss of their child.

As with our patients and their families, David handles it in different ways at different stages in the process. According to 2 Samuel 11-12, when their child became ill, David pleaded with God for the child's life. This is the bargaining stage of grief. Then he fasted, refused visitors and shut himself in his house, lying on the ground. This is depression stage. David has progressed to acceptance at his own pace by the time he says "But now that he is dead, why should I fast? Can I bring him back again?" Then he turned to comforting his wife.

A story from John 11-12 also deals with grief and bereavement. Jesus' dear friends, Mary and Martha have lost their brother Lazarus. As still occurs today, many members of the community had gathered to comfort them. When Jesus arrived, he was overwhelmed with pain for them. Modeling healthy grief, he freely and unapologetically showed his emotions and wept.

Job demonstrates another way of handling loss, turning to God. Upon hearing of the death of his sons and daughter, he immediately fell to the ground in worship. He praised God and acknowledged that He gives and takes away. When I see someone reacting in this way, it never ceases to amaze me that our patients and their families have such incredible faith. It is truly inspirational and motivates me to remain in this work.

Another thing I have observed is patients coming to terms with their deaths and giving instructions to family members. We see this in Genesis 49 when Jacob realizes he is about to be "gathered to his people." He calls his sons to him and tells them he knows he will die soon. Then he states his preference of burial locations.

As we have all witnessed, as soon Jacob openly accepts his death and tells his family that he is ready to die, promptly lets go and breathes his last. It is just as important for the patient to acknowledge her impending death as it is for the family to know that their beloved is ready to die.

In my fifteen years of volunteer work with hospice, I have seen all of the above reactions to death and dying. It gives me comfort to know that there really is nothing new under the sun!