Death Penalty for Traffic Infractions...I Like It!

If You're Gonna Drive Badly Be Prepared to Die!

Chris Berry
I like Californians. I've always considered their state a pretty progressive one, (Probably part of the reason everyone else seems to hate them so much). Oh they have their eccentrics and kooks, (who doesn't?) maybe even more than the other states but sometimes it takes people who think outside the box so to speak to come up with solutions to problems that you normally wouldn't consider.
One of the greatest innovations they've come up with in years I think is the road rage drive by shooting. This is a wonderful way to nip a serious problem like really bad driving in the bud. I like it, death penalty for traffic infractions. If you're going to drive badly in California be prepared to die. This is a concept that should be adopted country or even worldwide.
Lest you think this punishment is a bit harsh consider this: 99 percent of all traffic accidents that resulted in death, injury or property damage were caused by some fool driving badly. Think of all the money insurance companies would save. This would lower the insurance rates of the good drivers and the extra money we'd all have to spend would in turn bolster the economy. It's a win win situation no matter how you slice it. In addition although we'd be killing off all the bad drivers think of all the innocent victims who would now have the opportunity to survive.
"Oh, but life is sacred" you say. Hogwash! That's the same kind of thinking that the right to lifers use when they murder abortion doctors. And let's face it you know that there have been many a time when you yourself have fantasized about having a machine gun mount on the front of your car.
With over 200 million Americans who's going to miss a few here and there? I know I won't and unless we do something about it there will be more and more of these lunatics behind the wheel. These people seem to breed like rabbits. They're everywhere!
About the only other alternative I could think of would be to apply a huge strip of rubber about bumper level around each and every vehicle, (Like bumper cars). This might save a few lives but I'm afraid that we'd all be so busy having fun running into people that we'd never get anywhere or get anything done.
I say fire away. Who cares if they're innocent until proven guilty? Shoot them anyway. This I assure you will make everyone else pay real close attention to the quality of their driving, and will free up those unsightly traffic jams. No more being stuck behind slow drivers! No more being stuck in front of fast drivers! No more driving for miles with the turn signal on! No more left turns from the right lane! The list is endless.
Just think what this will do for all the other drivers' blood pressure and mental health. Finally, we will all be able to get back to the business of going wherever it was we were going in the first place. This is an Idea whose time has come. I urge you to write your lawmakers and if they don't change the law next time they're out driving in their car shoot them.

Published by Chris Berry

Chris is a writer, songwriter, and recording artist with Retrofit Records who lives in N/W Arizona with his wife, step son, grandson, 2 cats, 2 dogs, a horse, some chickens and one bad ass rooster. He writes...  View profile

  • With over 200 million Americans who's gonna miss a few here and there?
  • We've all had moments when we wished we had a machine gun mounted on our car.
  • Just think what it would do for insurance rates.
99 % of all accidents that resulted in death, injury or property damage were caused by some fool driving badly.

3 Comments

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  • B5/17/2012

    your a douche tool

  • Jonathan Thompson10/16/2006

    It's artificial selection. Gradually, as we weed out the bad drivers, as a nation the driving record will vastly improve.

  • mendomom10/16/2006

    I have noticed that a well placed oak tree, a sharp curve, or narrow bridge also work quite well. Rural quality control. LOL

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