Defining the Nice Guy

It seems the term "nice guy" is defined a bit differently between men and women and if we really think about it, often it can vary from one person to another. I was browsing the internet yesterday and ran across several articles that bash women for only wanting the bad boys and the usual song and dance of nice guys finishing last.

This is not true. Granted, the bad boys do have an appeal for women just as the bad girls do for men but overall the bad boy, depending on how he is defined is not the man most women want to spend their lives with.

But what exactly is a nice guy? Let's take a look at some of the traits of an actual nice guy and dispel some of the wrong ideas of nice guys.

A Nice Guy Isn't

A nice guy isn't a pushover, a wimp or needy. The definition of nice guy has nothing to do with any of these things. Jumping to please another's every whim is not being a nice guy it's showing lack of strength. We all want a partner that is happy but seriously unless she is seven months pregnant, if she wakes you up at three in the morning wanting a cheeseburger and you get up to go get it even though you have to be up for work in three hours, you are not a nice guy, you are as other men might call it "whipped". Being asked to fulfill outrageous requests just to amuse your partner is not a nice guy. It screams of insecure, scared, needy and yes, the word wimp or wuss jumps out as well. Nice guys are not mindless fools who seem to be unable or afraid to think for themselves. Men who behave like this will be used and yes, when the woman becomes bored they will find themselves dumped. There is a difference between a passive, pushover, insecure, wimpy guy and a nice guy.

A Nice Guy Is

A nice guy is just as the title implies; a nice person. He is pleasant to wait staff in a restaurant; he doesn't go looking to prove his masculinity by starting a fight with the first person that looks the wrong way at him. He holds door not just for women but for elderly people and yes you might find him on the side of road helping someone change their tire or at least offering to call for assistance for them.

He has a little of the bad boy streak in him but not the jerk streak. The bad boy streak brings out a side or mischief, adventure and just a slight bit of risk in him that one might not always expect from him. When this side comes out it's not uncommon that the lady in his life can't wait to get him alone and show him just how much she enjoys this side of him too.

He is attentive, kind, caring and ant all around a decent guy. He is simply a human makes mistakes, says dumb things from time to time and always tries to do what is right by himself and to others. But he makes no apologies for just being himself.

Most importantly a nice guy has the self respect to stand up for himself when somebody is not treating him kindly, to walk away when he is not being given back what he gives and confident enough to know that just because she might be hot, she is not the last or only woman on the face of the earth. The true nice guy knows he is a worthy catch and will accept nothing less than being treated with the equal respect he gives to those around him.

Women do want the nice guys but when the term nice guy is tossed around it is often misunderstood. Nice does not mean weak. Strength that is balanced to keep the jerk side away is one of the finest attributes in the true nice guys.

Rest assured gentlemen the woman that truly only want the real bad boys, are not women that nice guys want to date anyway. Just as a self respecting nice guy would never tolerate being treated poorly neither does a self respecting nice girl. If a woman goes chasing after the jerks while you are standing there offering her something better then wish her good riddance and offer yourself a sigh of relief that you dodged that emotional disaster.

Nice guys don't always finish last but they do have enough to offer to allow them to be picky on whom they choose to be with because nice guys are hot.