Depression....No, I Am Not Talking About the Economy!

I was thinking about depression. Yep, a topic not many people want to talk about to admit and those who are not depressed they do not want to acknowledge that there are people around them who are and need help and I am not talking medical...seems that we give a wordly answer to a spiritual problem. Those will not last long. You hae to deal with the root and not only the symptoms.

What is depression? I do not want to go much into the definition the dictionary gives, but I think it is a pretty good definition: gloomy, a state of low, deep sadness, etc. The Bible talks about depression, but in a different way a little bit. I like Psalm 42. David said something like this, " Why are you cast down my soul? Why are you so sad? " Well, he asked himself and many of us ask ourselves that, especially when we are depressed for a long time and nothing seems to aleviate it.

I asked myself that,too. Why am I cast down? I asked myself about my friends that are divorced or just single, or even married with a good home, children , and a husband and from the outside it looks all fine, but inside they are falling apart? I came to the conclusion that no matter what you have, it is not stuff that makes one happy. Single people think that once they are married, they will be happier and not feel alone; married people think that their spouse is THE problem and maybe being alone is the solution. And how wrong we all are!

As I was analyzing my own heart, and could not find an answer, God gave me a dream last night. The dream gave me an answer to my question. You know God speaks through dreams, right? According to John Paul Jackson, we sleep 20 yrs of our lives, so don't we think God would say something in those 20 years at all? Sometimes it is easier I think to receive it bc while asleep, we cannot argue with God.

So, anyway, the dream. This dream made me realize that the way my dad handled certain things in my childhood, it really changed my view of God and other people who have hurt me. The persons who hurt me have changed, but the truth is, the result is the same. There is a common attitude all these people have( because it is not their personalities, but the same enemy-satan), but for some reason they are all taken back in my memory to the feelings I felt as a child. Talk about things that happen in our childhood how much affect us! WOW! That really makes me thik about what I should teach my daughter and how important it is that I treat her in such a way that she grows up not comparing everything to negative things that happened in her childhood.

So, every time I am depressed, for some reason, it all goes back to make me feel like I felt as a child: betrayed, unimportant, not valued, that my opinion and feelings did not count, etc. The sad thing is that people try to come and talk to you and say, " But you have US. We love you. We are here for you". Well, actually it is very nice of them, not sad, but they fail to realize that doesn't help. My friend who has healthy children and a husband that loves her is not happier than me. My friend who is divorced and now living with her parents, is still just as sad or maybe worse than me who I live alone. She is lonelier with family around!!!

Why? Because as the Lord showed me, that usually there is ONE person that counts to us who we want to love us, accept us, care for us, make us feel important. Usually there is only ONE person. Now, for some is their dad. For others is their husband. For others maybe a sister, and for others someone else, but usually it starts in your childhood, or if not then someone whom you love and hurts you as an adult and truly has an impact on your life.A trauma.

For me it is my dad. I always wanted us to love us, accept us and think the world of us, but instead I did not feel that way. Yes, he took care of my physical needs, but, who cares when my emotional needs are ignored?He did not speak my love language which is touch, spending time with me , and caring about the things that matter to me. The sad thing is that other men that came into my life did the same thing and then you know what? You have these so called believers, or better said, pharasees, and come and say, " Well, maybe you are just not good enough for any man" " Maybe YOU are the problem". Excuse me!??? Is that how you let satan use your tongue to encourage someone?

God gave us the ministry of reconciliation and love. I am definitely for pointing out sin when it is the right time and it is clear someone just defies God, but I am totally against crushing someone who loves God and wants to live for Him and cannot figure out why certain things just do not go well in their lives although they seem to be doing everything right? You do not know the battle that is going on in their hearts and the frustration they deal with. And on top of them being mistreated as a child or even an adult, you come along and throw in your two cents worth. It is really only worth 2 cents and not even that because I think God's hearts breaks when someone is so insensitive and careless. It is like the pharasees who judge but do not lift a finger to help. Yes, the Bible says to judge right from wrong, but if you do also get involved to help change the person. Quit just talking about it and make a difference!!!!

So, God has shown me through this dream, although I thought I dealth with this, that for some reason I immediately equate every feeling of sadness with those feelings as a child and I do it so subconciuosly. I dont even realize it.

But, I am not going to leave you like that. God has the solution and I have to learn it. And if you are depressed, you have to learn it, too , if you want out.

See, I have a friend who is about to move because she is lonely.She thinks a change of location and making a friend will change that. I have another friend who thinks that if she had her husband back, she would be ok. I have a friend with children and a husband and who thinks if her husband just cared more, she would be ok. Another, that maybe if he had more money he could be more satisfied to do things for the LORD. It never ends. And it will never end as long as we are not looking at Jesus.There will always be something we are not happy about.

So, I asked God , " Lord, what is the solution? How do you get out of the hole of depression? How did you make it Jesus in this world with no wife, children, and so many people against you? How did you find joy?" And this was His answer:" I found joy because no one else's opinion mattered, but Father's. I came into to the world knowing Father was with Me and my joy was to make Him happy and obey Him. Only my relationship with Him really counted for me and not what My own people did to me". Remember when Jesus was on the cross, He was forsaken by so many people, yet He only cared about ONE, so He shouted, " Eli, Eli, lama sabactani?" " Father, Father, why have YOU forsaken Me?'" That is the person whose presence really counted.

Please, meditate on those things because there are tons of Scriptures where you will read how Jesus truly talked about His relationship with Father. What tJesus going in the morning in the middle of adversity? What made Him want to get out of bed? What kept Him joyous and willing to help people even those who did not really love Him? And what on Earth kept Him loving Judas who He knew was going to betray Him? " Keep your enemies even closer...?" That? No. His love for His Father. He said He came to do the will of His Father. He was so in love with his DADDY. He was such an obedient child, such an obedient SON!

So, you have people in your life who never apologized for what they did to you? Maybe they never will. What will keep you going? If you keep waiting to be treated differently than the most significant person in your life whoever that was, whoever's opionion really mattered to you did, think again. It might never happen. If you think your husband might wake up one day and fall at your feet, maybe he will, but most people do not have that happen, so think again. If you wait on someone to make you feel important, aahhh...people are too selfish to think of you. They think of themselves. If you wait for someone to notice you need a babysitter so you can work while they sit at home and do nothing and are available yet they do not offer their help, think again. Jesus said that in the last days because of multiplication of SIN, the love of many shall decrease. I need to watch my love level and on purpose I need to do exactly the opposite my flesh wants to do sometimes. This flesh needs to comply with God and because there is so much sin around us, we get enticed and selfish.

I say think again because the desires and things you want might never happen. Now, I do want them to happen for you and for me, but my dear, it might not. Meanwhile, what are you to do? Fall in love with your real FATHER. Jesus did. See, we need to copy Jesus. Let's see how He handled loneliness and depression. Let's see how He found purpose and joy in the middle of all the negativity and badmouthing. He was always busy doing something for others. "Wait a minute", you might say." I do not feel like getting out of bed. I am depressed. I have no energy whatesoever. I am too down.I am tired. No one cares about me. Why should I care? I am fed up with a bunch of nuckleheads.".

Please, stop listening to satan.There is ONE whose opinion should count NOW. Forget about your dad, your mom, your husband, your child, your sister, or aunt, etc. whose approval you crave so much. I am definitely going to try even harder from now on to not care what my dad thinks about me, now that I realize because of this dream, how much I do care about that. It hinders my relationship with Father.

As soon as you start feeling gloomy, realize who is doing that. Paul said one time something like this, " ...for we are not in the dark about the TRICKS of the enemy". They are just TRICKS, nothing substantial. It becomes substantial only if you believe it.

Develop your relationship with God. I mean it. Really, just sit down on your living room floor or your favorite spot in the house and close your eyes and imagine Jesus right there with you. He is your groom. He will NEVER leave you or forsake you. He has no favorites. He loves you and He cares for you. Hebrews says He intercedes for YOU. Jesus is a giver. He gave His live and He is still giving...He never stops being good to you. He will definitely pay what they deserve those who disobey Him and ignore Him because He is love , but also holy, but if you come to Him and acknowledge your sins and that He died for you and believe that He is alive now, then a life of joy awaits on you. No, it doesnt mean things will necessarily change. Remember...think again, but your RELATIONSHIP with FATHER is what will change and that in turn will change how you look at things, what will give you purpose even when to others it looks like no big deal? It is realizing that you need to shift from putting the burden on the ONE person whom you want to please, to Father God, and only His opinion matters and no one else's.

So, when you are lonely, you know you are NOT, because your Father is with you; when you are spoken ill of, you know that you can brush it off, because it did not come from your Father's mouth, and when you are not considered important, you know HE thinks you are important. Now, also, when He doesnt like something in your life, that is all that should matter, not what people accept as good. See, our whole relationship should revolve around pleasing Father because we are so loved by Him and and we love Him.

I do not get up and go and reach people based on what I feel today and who hurt me or not; I do it because of MY relationship with Father. I am here for HIM. I was sent into this world on a mission: to do HIS will and one day I will go back and give a report of how well I did or not.

So, let's shift whose approval we want. Let's change persons here. Let Father be the one we will care from now on to please and whose approval we seek. Let His opionion matter ONLY and then joy will flood. He never changes, so we know we are safe in putting our trust in Him. He will never disappoint us. And if you have been looking at God as you look at those people in your life that hurt you, as I have, then renew your mind. Get into God's written Word and come on, it is time to believe that Bible already literally. God cannot do one thing: LIE.

Just believe!