Desperate Housewives Top 7 Quotes

With all of the quirky characters on Desperate Housewives it is easy to understand why there are lots of great quotes that keep viewers laughing. It is highly doubtful that this show could have done so well without all of the comedy, intended or not.

Susan Mayer is a complete klutz and her physical antics week after week still has not gotten stale. Whether she meets the guy of her dreams sitting naked in a pile of bushes or falling through a floor, you don't know if you should feel sorry for her or laugh at her miserable life.

Another character who tosses out witty comments is another desperate housewife Gabriel. Besides her tangy replies, she also gets into physical messes, like the time she tried to get her small frame over a tall fence to meet her teenage lover. The end result received lots of laughter as she too went head first into one bush after another.

Besides these great physical moments on Desperate Housewives what really makes the show great are some of these quotes that leave you shocked and laughing.

Desperate Housewives Top 7 Quotes #1

Every time we went out for pizza you could have said, "Hey, I once killed a man."

Desperate Housewives Top 7 Quotes #2

Okay, yes I am closer to your father than I have been in the past, the bitter hatred has now settled to a respectful disgust.

Desperate Housewives Top 7 Quotes #3

Oh, sweetie, they didn't abandon you because you're a whore, they abandoned you because you weren't all that nice to begin with.

Desperate Housewives Top 7 Quotes #4

The opposite of love isn't hate. It's indifference. And if you hate me, that means you still care and we're still connected and I still have a chance to set you right.

Desperate Housewives Top 7 Quotes #5

I will take away your money, your family, and your dignity. And I am thrilled you still love me. Because I want what's going to happen to you to hurt as much as humanly possible. I'm just so glad you didn't die before I told you that.

Desperate Housewives Top 7 Quotes #6

Rex Van De Kamp: I can't believe you tried to kill me.
Bree Van De Kamp: Yes, well, I feel badly about that.

Desperate Housewives Top 7 Quotes #7

Julie Mayer: When was the last time you had sex?
[Susan stops what she is doing]
Julie Mayer: Are you mad that I asked?
Susan Mayer: No, I'm just trying to remember.