Diary of a College Dropout

As I become older, it is becoming more and more apparent the importance of getting a good education. But what costs do I sacrifice along the way? I'm not talking about money here either. I've seen all my classmates graduate with no idea what they plan to do after leaving school. Meanwhile, I dropped out in my junior year to pursue the real world and I haven't regretted a single moment. Not to say that my fellow classmates regret being schooled, but at what cost have they achieved their dream education?

The first time around in college, my eyes were closed to many things. I was a straight A student, I was on the dean's list, I did whatever my professors asked of me, and I paid anything the school wanted me to without question. And why? Because, I was immature and naïve. But it wasn't just me that was taken advantage of. My family as well was victimized. They were tricked into thinking a private education, although thousands of dollars each semester, was really the best thing for me. I am a first generation college student and it meant the world to me to be the first to graduate with a degree.

I'd like to say college was everything I dreamed it would be, but that's just not the truth. It was hard for me, extremely hard. Sure, I was your model student. Good grades, resident assistant in my dorms, and always ready to help. But it wasn't enough to get me the education I paid for. There were many times when I was not called upon, not chosen, and simply put, just ignored by professors and other school officials. It wasn't fair either. I paid just as much as the next student and yet I don't get the same education, the same chances, and opportunities to succeed. The only reason I can see for my treatment is because I wasn't the rich girl, I had to work. I wasn't the popular girl that everyone loved, including professors who favored these sorts. And I definitely wasn't the majority; I am a minority student of mixed background.

So, after two and a half years of being put down and put upon I quit. I walked out the door and never looked back. Needless to say my family and those who supported me were quite disappointed that I dropped out. But not one of them took a moment to realize the reasons why I quit. After some time I began to think that maybe I was just being silly or selfish. Maybe it was me that allowed me to be used and thrown out like yesterdays paper. So I decided to give it another try with an open mind.

As a returning student I expected to be welcomed back with open arms. After all I would be returning to my alma mater. But it just wasn't so. Regaining acceptance from all the people I backed out on years ago was going to be tougher than I thought. Getting accepted back into the school was the easy part. But, before I even registered for my first class I began to run into trouble, and it was oh so familiar. All the school cared about was getting me to register so they could start sucking money like a vacuum again. I was getting letters from financial aid saying I owed amounts of money before I ever got my acceptance letter. To me, this did not make much sense.

Shouldn't the school care about me as an individual and not just my money? Numerous phone calls I made to the school with my questions were never returned. I also found it extremely difficult to make an appointment with an academic advisor or even my admissions counselor. A part of my acceptance required that I audition for the school. The proctor of my audition made me feel inadequate and even stupid. I was embarrassed and not made to feel welcome. It was one of the most humiliating experiences of my life. After the audition I was not escorted anywhere, the proctor simply pointed to the door and said "that's it". I exited the building as fast as I could, shed a few brief tears, and then went back to the real world and continued my life as usual.

But, everything about my readmissions process was really bothering me. So, I took it upon myself to personally write a letter to the president of my college. I took my time and organized my thoughts carefully. I really wanted them to take notice of how I was treated and realize how unfair it was. In many more words, I told them the most important part of my education is me. If they can't take the time to recognize my talents and help them grow, than it's not worth my money. At the same time, I notified them of my intent to not attend their school in the future, nor would I recommend them to a single person.

As soon as my letter was received the dean of academics called me at home. I was still quite angered so I refused to speak with him or any other person affiliated with their school. And, just as I thought they could care less. I received one phone call the day my letter was delivered and I have not heard from the school since. No other calls for apology, no correspondence, nothing at all.

Above all, I'm glad I wrote the letter. I've done more than most of my classmates, which is stand up for myself and what I believe is right. I'm not the one sitting awake a night wondering what I'm going to do with the rest of my life, I'm doing it. I'm not the one who wasted 4 years at a private school only to learn after graduation that I don't know anything about the real world. I'm glad I got out when I did and proud of myself for walking away the second time, no matter what anybody thinks of me.

My quest for education is not over though; I will be learning all my life. I'm sure too that I will find another school that will accommodate my needs and wants in an education. It may be another private school or it may even be public, or community college. Most of all I've learned what appears to be true may not actually be. The choices we make when we are young and pressured may not be the best for our future either.

I truly believe it would be beneficial for every student to take some time off from school before graduating, even if it's only 6 months. Learn how to live, learn what life is all about, and discover your true passions. I've always said, school teaches you how to be good at taking exams, writing papers, and getting good grades. Getting a degree doesn't teach you how to be successful in life. Only experience can do that for you. There are many ways to learn outside of the classroom and I try to take advantage of them everyday. If there's something you want, go out there and get it!