Dictionary of Relationship Terms

Love is just combat...with a good attitude!

Presuming to know the difference is relationship!

Relationship is manipulating combat advantageously.

Calamity...Well that's when the old lady is pissed off, hence a bad attitude.

Catastrophe...That's when the old lady is pissed off and she told your mother and sister in-law all about it.

Frickin' Tragedy...Hmm, that's when the catastrophe escalates due to failure to correct the calamity.

Fishing Trip...Prelude to a calamity!

Fishing Trip (including alcohol)...Prelude to a catastrophe!

Actually following through and going on the fishing trip...a catastrophe!

Actually following through and going on the fishing trip (including alcohol)...Definitely a Frickin' Tragedy!

Coming home from the fishing trip...Brief calamity then relationship!

Coming home from the fishing trip (including alcohol)...A catastrophe...followed by three days of calamity then relationship. (note: The process can be shortened by fornication on the first night home, followed by one day of calamity then relationship).

Bring the band home after a gig at three AM...Disaster!

Bring the band home at three AM with the Band Aids (groupies)...Fricking Disaster!

Alcohol...Medication used o anesthetize calamity thereby invoking a Frickin' Tragedy.

Fornication...Combat but both partners are on the same side and like it, (not necessarily relationship). Relationship is when both parties are on the same side, like it, AND like each other!

Disaster...Sleeping outside in the car!

Fricking Disaster...Sleeping outside without the benefit of a car or Band Aid!

Break...The old lady needs you to take out the trash amidst a calamity, catastrophe, or Frickin' Tragedy.

G*dd^mmit!...Breaks over!