Different Types of Submission in BDSM: Submissive, Slave and Pet
Submissive - As a submissive you are in the first tier lets say of a Dominant/submissive lifestyle. You submit to your Master, you give up control for long periods of time. However you have your opinions and your choices and you can still make them. Say you do the dishes and pay the bills, these things usually are still under your control. It changes only during set times and parameters. There is also the thought of the "power balance" between dominant and submissive. Meaning that in a submissive role although you give up the control the power is really still 50/50 just in a different setting and under more intense circumstances. Sex is usually a large part of this relationship and mostly where the submission enters in. Now don't get me wrong the intensity is still strong and the punishments and pain are real and overwhelming however you have more of an option to stop and this doesn't spill over into the everyday that much.
Slave - As a slave control is given up completely. The power balance is completely tipped in the Dominants direction. However keep in mind this is a choice the slave makes not something she/he was made to do. Slaves usually are slaves 24/7. They may work but when they get home there is no distinction from normal day to a BDSM day, that person is always a slave from the day they ask for that. As a slave sex is still very real and alive however not always the goal and not needed for the Dominant and slave to be in that persona. As a slave the lifestyle is usually more intense in pain, humiliation and just pure pleasure. Something to remember however is that as a slave this does not mean if the Dominant asks you to break the law or hurt yourself that you should obey on a whim. If a Dominant is asking you to do things that are against the law or against your moral values than he or she is not a true dominant.
Pet - This hasn't always been a classification of a submissive person and is still controversial in some circles. A pet is more on the side of a slave except for one large difference, sex does not have to be involved. In many cases it is not. If you have become a pet it is to give up yourself and obey, you gain pleasure from the control and the obeying not from sexual play. There can be play but it is rare in this kind of lifestyle. This submission is one of the most dangerous because you can lose yourself mentally because you so rarely have thoughts of your own, you usually do not work and although you may discuss things with your Dominant he is last say in all things.
Ultimately the deeper you go into submission the stronger you have to be which of course is peculiar since you have to give up more of your control with each level. But you have to be very sure of yourself to give up every ounce of control and thought. Taking each step is serious and should never be taken light by the Dominant and submissive, especially if you want to remain safe, sane, and consensual.
Published by Chloe Thorn
I am 33, I have a wonderful daughter who is 14..... I love to read, write, cook, and dance. I also enjoy listening to music as loud as I can crank it. All genres of music interest me but especially, rock, po... View profile
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19 Comments
Post a CommentWhile I agree that pets don’t usually have the responsibilities that some slaves will toward things like cleaning and serving, I was surprised to read they “usually do not work.” I don’t know many people in this millennium who don’t work, submissive or otherwise. It has also not been my experience that sex is rare in this type of lifestyle.
I think this article does a great disservice by lumping all forms of submission into only two categories, and at then portraying the extreme examples of those situations.
To begin with, the vast majority of Ds relationships will never be the type of 24/7 situations described in this article. This doesn’t make their submission any less real or valid. A good amount of the time it just means that life gets in the way of indulging their fantasies on such a time intensive level.
Trying to define all submissives as either pets or slaves is as reasonable as trying to define all colors as either red or green. There are many hues, combinations, and shades of each making up an artist’s palette. What about the sissies and their Mistresses? What about the Daddy Doms and their baby girls? There are pain sluts and sex toys, dollies and bondage lovers and too many to list off the top of my head. While some of them may be considered fetishes in addition to forms of submission, they are no less real than the pet who relinquishes her personality for her Master’s pleasure.
Submission is not a prescribed set of behaviors; it is the surrender to another person, in whatever form that takes. And Dominance is not making a person perform one task or another, it’s finding out what makes the submissive tick and using it to make their surrender safe and rewarding.
I would hate to think anyone reading this article would come away with the impression there are only two forms of submission, requiring a bigger commitment than they are able to make. Submission can be as big as surrendering your personality, or as small as wearing clothes you’re not comfortable with for the pleasure or your partner. So long as both parties find it rewarding, safe, sane, and consensusal, there is no right or wrong way to be submissive.
message was for Chloe not manny,,,richard cat881@gmail.com again very intersting personality,,,i write myself,,,write and tell memore about yourself
Very interesting person you are. I write myself. Feel free to write me at cat881@gmail.com and tell me more about yourself and lifestyle and desires. Richard
who ever made this is so WRONG! A pet is much more...and its very sexual. This person needs to not write about things they have no clue about. A pet is loving and loyal to their owner plus very intelligent and protective
Sure. I want to be fed, cared and taken care of bya beautiful female master, who don't allow me to work outside the house. So, she will bring the bacon and I will take of everything else. Anytakers? And yes, I'm very submissive as long as I'm well fed.
I've been looking for a master, dillon2cute_@hotmail.com
I was exhibited as a slave and all the owner's friends enjoyed it. As a slave I had no rights, no say in any thing...........
I agree, been there, done that. I was a pet first and then became slave and owned property, with no privileges. My job was to please and serve my mistress. I was also shown off at group meetings and other functions. No fantasy or fiction here. I really loved to belong to someone.
I agree with marina. Other than fantasy and fiction, I was a real pet and slave; owned by two different owners. "Yes,owned " like real property, used and or abused. As a pet I was cared for and was a show item. As a slave I was controlled and ordered to work for my owner and her friends. I was exhibited as a slave and all the owner's friends enjoyed it. As a slave I had no rights, no say in any thing. My job was to serve and please my owner. sometimes I was rented out for service to others. This is real, no fiction or fantasy. No I am free and unowned.
i agree with Marina 100% - i've been a pet for five years and had several Owners. A pet is someone favored & cherished as well as de-humanized and humbled. You don't tell your non-human dog or cat to go clean the bathroom, right? Yet so many people ask "What's the difference between a slave and a pet?" (to which i reply "Well, just say the words and they don't even sound like the same thing - pet... slave.... Get it?")
The more affectionate you are with a non-human dog or cat the more you get back from them - it's the same with petgirls like me :D
[Good thing I copied this]
Once you find your kink, or at least have a fair idea about what turns you on, which requires study, thought, experimentation, study, more thought, and thankfully, more experimentation, the only label you will need is your very own name.
In summation, look not to your inherent desire to define and catergorize, but, rather, look to the desires that drove you to this very article for answers and never look back.
S.