Dining at Dante's at Pier 39 in San Francisco, California

I am the quintessential tourist. All those tourist traps out there? Those were made especially for me. This means that I tend to get hungry whilst dragging my poor friends through yet another 3 for 10 dollah T-shirt shop... which in turn means we often get subjected to some over-priced crappy food. Dante'sRestaurant in San Francisco, California is right up there with some of the crappiest ever.

The menu outside looked promising. I'm a lobster fanatic and they had three choices, plus they were right there on the water and they do allow smoking out on the heated deck. What could possibly be wrong with that scenario? Well, the food. The food could be wrong, and it was horribly, terribly wrong.

You enter through the bar if you're on the lower deck of Pier 39 at Fisherman's Wharf in San Francisco. After a few minutes we managed to locate someone who could seat us. It was Saturday night so I let that slide, my friend wanted to just leave rather than wait. I shoulda listened to him.

We were seated on Dante's deck by the water with a rather nice view of a Celebrity Cruise Ship. The temporary see-through walls were up since this was March and it was chilly at night, but the sky was open and there were heat pole thingies everywhere, so it was really quite pleasant. They do have a full dining room inside and upstairs, but I never ventured that far.

Our waitress was of the happy, perky variety and even a bit mouthy. I liked her. heh. She was apparently tending to the entire bar and the deck so the slow service was sorta understandable. She did the best she could, and quite cheerfully.

But oooh that food. Ugh. I ordered the Surf-n-Turf which was listed at Market Price (around $35 that evening). This is two little lobster tails with a small Fillet and garlic mashed potatoes. First, I'm sick to death of this fad of putting garlic in perfectly good mashed potatoes. Everyone is doing it these days and it's really getting on my nerves. Grrr argh. One of my lobster tails was cooked to mush, the other was done just right, but then ruined by being sat on top of the damn garlic potatoes and absorbing all the garlic taste into it. yuck. The fillet was cooked medium rare as requested, but was apparently old meat or something. It was neither tender nor tasty, having a bit of that icky livery taste. Now, I'm one of those odd folks who actually likes liver, but when I'm in the mood for it I'll order it... when I want a steak, I do not want liver. Seems simple enough, eh? I did not touch the potatoes.

My friend had Dante's Grand Platter for $25.95, which consisted of one tiny, undercooked-and-rubbery lobster tail, a Fillet that he said was better than mine (probably because of all those beers he'd had), a bad seared Salmon, icky Sea bass, and unremarkable Tequila Prawns.

With those two entrees and our drinks, the total with tip was over $100. That's insanity. I mean, yeah, he was drinking beer, but come on! I fear perhaps the tip had already been added in and I just hadn't caught that part as she did not bring back the itemized bill with the signature slip. Sneaky.

I was going to give Dante's 2 stars, but the more I think about the price versus the really awful food.. well... no ambiance in the world can overcome that. I have to go with 1 star and say avoid this place like the hell that it is.

Pier 39
San Francisco, CA 94133
415-421-5778