Discipline: "No" Means "NO" ...Children Need Limits

Remember when your parents said "NO"? It meant NO, no candy, no toys, no jumping on the bed, no hitting your sister or you were going to face the wrath of a spanking or a good punishment you would not forget. It meant that if you were acting silly and hurt your leg jumping off the neighbors porch then "that's what you get for not listening". Now people would be suing the neighbor because their child got hurt on the property.

"NO" from parents to their children now means cry, scream, hit, and kick until it's a "YES" , go ahead, I don't care, and whatever just leave me alone. We need to remember and exercise the fact that we are the adults and they are the children. We are in charge and responsible for them and their actions.

We NEED to tell them "NO" and follow through because we love them, want to teach them right from wrong and to keep them safe. Believe it or not children want limits that's how they know we care.

Following through is the hardest part, but only for a short time. After a child knows YOU ARE NOT CHANGING YOUR MIND following through will be less time consuming and more quiet. Keep in mind to think about your answer before blurting out "NO". For example: "mom can I have a snack?" "NO." "Well you can have grapes or an apple." Your first answer should have been "Yes but only grapes or an apple." If that is not what they want and they are getting angry or throwing a fit your answer is simply "THAT IS YOUR ONLY CHOICE". Do not engage in a screaming match or a power struggle. Negotiating is not acceptable. This will only encourage more arguments in other situations. DO NOT GIVE IN!

If they have caught you while you are on the phone or are busy and you really can't think about the answer then simple say "I'll think about it" or " I will talk about it when I'm ready".

Saying the obvious helps the point sink in "I'M NOT CHANGING MY MIND, IT'S YOUR ONLY CHOICE, YOUR NOT AT GRANDMA'S, THE RULES HAVE NOT CHANGED".

Today's society has led us to believe that children should be rewarded for all that they do, including go to school. That all students should be recognized the same no matter the amount of effort. The world is full of successes and disappointments and sometimes humiliation. These life lessons should be taught early, so that they strive to be the best that they can be.