Disciplining is Part of a Parent's Job

Listening to some media outlets, there seems to be a constant influx of news regarding children, youth and teens, behaving badly or downright criminal. School shootings, armed robberies, bringing weapons to school, the list go on and on. It may appear that children nowadays are completely out of control. They lack respect and discipline. So why is this happening? Well, it is not hard to find the answers. The problem with kids today is the same thing that is wrong with the adults today. Although there are some children that are raised correctly and still mange to mess up their lives, the majority of these children's problems come directly from their parents or adults in their lives.

First of all, children are very impressionable. They see adults acting a certain way, good or bad, and the copy that behavior. The court system and others act as if children should know better, and perhaps they should, but when adults are acting badly how do you think that affects children? For example, how can we focus on school shootings without focusing on workplace shootings? Before school shootings became popular, there were, and still are, workplace shootings that take place. News stories constantly show adults resolving their disputes with violence, so what would you expect from children? There are many children who are not raised in a family where morals and ethics are taught.

These children are surrounded with dysfunction all around them, including violence and drugs. They grow up with dysfunctional attitudes and ideas. Society turns a blind eye to the problems facing these children, but is quick to condemn and punish them when they succumb to their environment. You have children being raised by parents who are either too young or not ready to be parents. You know the ones - they leave small children in the car, sometimes a running car. They leave children locked in an extremely hot or cold car. They leave small children home alone. They are never home or somebody else is always watching their children. And of course, there are the parents using or addicted to drugs and alcohol, whose priority is their next high not their children.

The criminal justice system is quick to punish children, and in some cases, in a harsh manner. However, some people look down on parents punishing their own children. They expect for you to reason or talk with your child, even a two-year old. There are too many parents who want to be their child's friend. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be your child's friend, in fact, that's a very good thing, but a parent's first responsibility is to be a parent and that means letting the child know who the parent and who the child is at a young age, not when they are 13-years old. Of course, the problem is that some parents don't know how to spank appropriately.

In my opinion, there is absolutely nothing wrong with spanking a child as long as the spanking doesn't not include taps on the head or torso area. Spanking is not abuse. Abuse is beating, slapping, hitting, spitting, burning (purposely), kicking, throwing things at the child, and cursing at the child. Abuse leaves marks. Spanking or tapping leaves no marks and no emotional consequences. I was spanked as a child, as were many people, and most of us have not turned into criminals or suffer from emotional issues.

Children need and want discipline. A lack of discipline will result in a lack of respect toward the parent by the child. I shake my head at these people who appear on talk shows with teenagers out of control. They don't know what to do. I guess not. They never disciplined the child when the child was younger and now they try to discipline them and it doesn't work. And it won't work. Discipline should start as soon as that child turns two years old. Yes, they don't call them the terrible twos and threes for nothing. At this age, children need to know who is in charge. I also shake my head when I'm in a store and a small child - usually two to four years old, is having a tantrum and the parent is whispering or letting the child rant and rave. This is totally ridiculous. It reflects the parent's lack of parental control, and in my opinion, a lack of parenting skills.

That screaming two-year old will eventually become a screaming and disrespectful 12-year old. And some of these parents wonder why their teenagers curse or physical harm them. Are you kidding? There is no way on this earth I would give birth to a child and that child would curse me or do any physical harm to me. It is a sad situation when a parent is scared of their own child. Believe me - this would not happen at all if you discipline that child when they are much younger. You don't need to scream at the top of your lungs or become abusive, but you should exercise some discipline and control of that child. In fact, if you did the child wouldn't scream and act out in public at all. I've seen well-behaved young children; there is no need for a parent to let a young child have a tantrum. There's should be no such thing as a temper tantrum. It's not cute, it's embarrassing.