Divorce and Communication Problems

Communication in a relationship can be as difficult as a brain surgery. I had many breakups over poor communication. I know of many couples out there struggling in their relationship because they don't know how to express themselves to their lover.

A poor communication skill is the ice berg for most couples. People could be professionals and making 100 thousands dollars a year but they couldn't keep their mate when they wanted to. It happened to me, most of my relationship ended this way, when I don't even want it to end. I lost the person that I love the most in this world because I couldn't even utter a word when I needed to. I met somebody over coffee one day and I let him took off without asking him for his contact number and I spend months looking for him when I could have done that in the first place. I notice that when he got up to leave he was going to ask me for something but I tried to keep busy talking to the guy sitting next to me when I should have stood up and say good-bye to him and maybe exchange numbers. Well, it's too late for that now.

I've learned so much from my past that poor communication skills can ruin relationships in your life even with career and friendship . I took a college course in communication and it taught me that clear and concise communication is the key to any relationship. Relationship is a very fragile topic. One mate can say something and the other can think something completely out of line. For example, when you pick up the phone on your brother and your boyfriend thinks that you are talking to another guy and no matter how hard you tried to explain he won't listen and he insists that it's another guy not your brother. For example, I tried to get off the phone with a guy I'm talking to because it's lunch time at work but he thought that I'm getting off the phone because I have something very secretive I need to do like go make out with another guy or something like that. I forgot one thing: I didn't tell him that I'm getting off the phone for lunch; I just said I have to go do something now and he thought I had something to hide. What did he do then, he told his friend to crank call me and harassed me. I got really piss off, his friend was very rude to me on the phone and tried to interrogates me instead of talking nicely to me.

I thought to myself this guy is a psycho because I was just going to eat lunch. Miscommunication happens every single day. Sometimes you think people don't like you but maybe they're just having bad day . You will never know until you find out from them. I try to refrain from assuming because you can be wrong sometimes as we all have learned that.

The key to a good relationship or at least an understanding one is clear and concise communication. You should practice this and make a good habit out of it. You should practice clear communication with your mate. How do you do this? Clear communication is telling your mate exactly what you want to convey to him. For example, if you don't want to go out today because you're tire from work than say it exactly like that to him instead of a short and choppy response "I don't want to go out" you should say "I don't want to go out because I'm very tire from work and can't move a finger, can we do this when I'm not tire." He would say "oh you are tire, let me help you to a massage or something" , and then he won't be angry thinking that you're blowing him off.

If your mate ever misunderstand you, you should try your best to clear things up so misunderstanding doesn't continue and feelings doesn't get hurt and big fight doesn't followed.