Divorce Recovery Tips for Men
Interview with Therapist Paul Dalton MS, LPCC, CADC
Divorce can be difficult for men just as it can be difficult for women. To help understand what type of impact divorce typically has on men and for divorce recovery tips for men, I have interviewed therapist Paul Dalton MS, LPCC, CADC.
Tell me a little bit about yourself.
"I am a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor. I am also a Certified Alcohol and Drug Counselor. I have experience working with adults, adolescents and children on various mental health issues."
What type of impact does divorce typically have on men?
"In general, divorce impacts men, I believe, a little different than women. It also depends on the person initiating the divorce. If a man is on the receiving end, he is usually anxious, depressed and lonely. Some men turn to good friends and family and some turn to chemicals, other women or bad habits. Men usually will find themselves alone more than women, although it is generally not a good idea. Anger is common that usually comes from the pain of divorce.
If a man is initiating a divorce, they can become distant with a decrease sex drive toward their spouse. They're away from home activity increases and outside activities become a priority. The can turn to their children or work to avoid close spousal contact. Work, relationships, health and general well being seem to be affected more with males than females."
What are some divorce recovery tips you can give men?
"The following are my divorce recovery tips for men:
Don't get a new woman! It doesn't work for long. Grief is something that has to be experienced. Love loss hurts. Experience, get help, move on. Don't try to replace it.
Get healthy! Do things you have always wanted to do. Become the person you have always wanted to be, then go looking for someone new. You can't attract what you don't have. Reach out for help! Divorce recovery workshops, counselors, friends and family can all provide support.
Don't try to control your ex wife or your children. Control yourself. Seek spiritual and or religious help."
What type of professional help is available for men who want to recover from divorce?
"Help can be provided by professional counselors, your church and or pastor, and groups that specialize in divorce recovery. Find a counselor that is a good match for you! Don't be afraid to fire one or two to get someone good!"
What last advice would you like to leave for men who want to recover from divorce?
"Be good to yourself, your kids and to your ex spouse. Anger is not a positive emotion. If you want to be well, you have to find peace, love and understanding. Anger, jealousy and resentment will keep you stuck in grief over a marriage gone bad."
Thank you Paul for doing the interview on divorce recovery for men. For more information on Paul Dalton or his work you can check out his website on www.ezcounseling.com .
Recommended Readings:
Published by Jaleh
JALEH holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology and a Masters of Science in Marriage and Family Counseling. She is the book author of Making Marriage a Success and Life's Little How to Book which can be... View profile
- The Christie Brinkley Divorce Trial from an Infidelity Expert's Perspective The Brinkley-Cook divorce trial has dominated the news. An infidelity expert shares her observations and insights on some of the infidelity-related aspects of the divorce trial of Christie Brinkley and Peter Cook.
Recovering from Infidelity and DivorceThe grief of discovering infidelity and suffering divorce can be paralysing. Here's how one determined woman set about rebuilding her life.- Division of Property in a DivorceProperty from a marriage has to be divided when the parties divorce. While the issues is handled differently from state to state, this article gives an overview of the general components of the process.
- Alternative Dispute Resolution in DivorceADR - Alternative Dispute Resolution - provides many varied approaches to allow parties to take charge of their divorce and, with their input and direct involvement, while working with other professionals, bring about...
- What You Need to Know About Verizon's Friends and Family PlanFriends and Family is the latest feature from Verizon. It sounds great, but can it really save you money?
- Recovering from Divorce
- When Divorce Recovery Hurts Too Long - Series 2-15
- When Divorce Recovery Hurts Too Long - Series 5 of 15 -
- Recovering from Divorce: Interview with Dr. Florence Rosiello
- When Divorce Recovery Hurts Too Long: Series 3 of 15
- 10 Rules for the First Date After Divorce
- Tips for Grieving a Divorce: Interview with Therapist Dr. Penn Barbosa