Divorce: Three Things You Must Remember

Divorce is difficult enough, as it is. This statement is true for both women and men. Along with the pain of watching a marriage crumble, there are likely to be emotional responses. Some feelings cannot be avoided, but mistakes can be. The following tips are not exhaustive, and the author is by no means a legal expert, just one man who has been there.

Divorce: Honesty is easier to keep track of. Why lie? If a divorcee's position is such that, dishonesty is required to support it, then that position is simply not so strong in the first place. If the reason for the divorce is irreconcilable differences, or any other reason, then say so. But to stoop to a false accusation in order to "win" an argument in the courtroom is no victory and will likely come back to haunt you anyway.

Being honest in a divorce is not easy. Sometimes being truthful is embarrassing. Sometimes, it's downright painful. Sometimes, the truth will not play to your advantage. Still, with all of that in mind, it's going to prove to be the better choice. Besides, simply not being a compatible match for another person is no crime, in and of itself. Perjury is, though. If your divorce is adversarial, that's sure one powerful weapon to give the other camp to use against you later.

Divorce: Parental alienation is child abuse. Kids, by nature, want to love both parents. Even if your attitude towards an ex is such that, you wish you'd never met them in the first place, your kids don't feel that same way. To attempt to drive a wedge between the children and your ex is not only painful and confusing for them, it's just plain immature, thoughtless, and selfish. Don't dump your hang-ups on your innocent children. Your mistakes are not their fault, and the kids are infinitely more than mere "leverage."

Divorce: Your ex is still a human. Whatever image there may be in your mind of your ex, I'd bet dollars to donuts it's biased, and not entirely fair. At one point, you loved this person enough to marry them, so to be vicious or cruel to them is not only monstrous, it reflects on your personal preferences too. Besides all of that, your former partner in crime is still a human being. They have feelings. They also feel pain. Divorce is difficult enough for both of you. Why add to the pain?

Source:
Findlaw.com "Do's and Dont's: False Allegations of Child Abuse"
PAAwareness.org
Personal experience