Do You Comprehend What You Read?

I write a lot. I don't publish all of it. Some of it isn't meant for public consumption. Some of it gets mailed, some e-mailed, and some letters I never meant to send get lost and thrown away [1] . I write what I like, how I like and mean exactly what I write. I take great pains in editing and though there is always something that slips through my "voice" is never a casualty of callousness.

That being said I am continuously amazed at the commentary I get on my articles. Yes, some of the things I write are meant to incite a riot. Yes some of the titles, most notably Drop Dead Ted, which was kind of sort of about Ted Kennedy but not really, are meant to catch your attention. What would be the point of having a title if it didn't catch your attention? It's SUPPOSED to PROVOKE you into reading the piece.

And that means I actually expect you to READ it AND, get this, COMPREHEND what you read! I am always stunned by the comments because it is obvious many people have failed the reading comprehension part of the standardized testing.

When I wrote about a plus sized woman shopping in, Bathing Suit Shopping: Finding the Right Suit for Your Body, I expected there to be some people who understood it was a message about not spending a ton (Ha! I kill me!) of money on a bathing suit you weren't comfortable being seen in. I also expected that people, particularly women who were plus sized like me would get the message that they need not be afraid of whatever number was on the tag because the right number looks infinitely better than one that is three numbers too small. BUT NO! People commented on how it must be nice to be me and pick on plus sized women. HELLO? Comprehension would dictate my mention of my size fluctuations from 9 to 20 might have been the biggest hint that I too was a PLUS size! Even my plea at the very end of the piece fell on uncomprehending eyes.

One piece in particular garners negative commentary on a regular basis. Top Ten Gift Ideas for Ten Year Old Boys seems to be a magnet for the overindulgent fool who is soon parted with his/her money buying the electronics he/she, and probably the spoiled rotten ten year old in his/her life, feels are a necessity for happiness. My experience with the small pack of ten year olds who roamed my property a few years back was that cheaper and in bulk was better fun than expensive and meant for one or maybe two in turns. But hey what did I know after all I was only the mother of one at a time and two in total. Therefor the article is written based on my own experience with my own kids and not the child specific to the numerous readers who told me I was cheap. News flash people my sons had plenty of expensive electronic thing-a-ma-jigs but a decade later the stuff they tell stories about was cheap and bought in bulk for sharing.

I have been prompted to write this after several incoherent comments were added to various articles this week. Oddly, even though I know what I wrote, I always go back and re-read it with the new comment in mind to see if anything I wrote can be misconstrued and if I should offer an apology to some cult, sect, race, minority, majority, or class. So far I haven't found a need to do so. It makes me wonder if they are more successful with books on tape but I guess that is dependent on them having extensive vocabulary and the inflection the reader imparts. I'm not exactly sure how to go about boosting comprehension except for doing more reading of actual written words. Alas these people who latch onto three words from one sentence and two from another and smash them together to make up their own story don't seem to reading, at least not in the true sense of the word, and that is why they can't comprehend what is going on.

Boy I almost can't wait to hear the comments on this one!

Be safe!

[1] "letters that you never meant to send get lost and thrown away" Name by John Rzeznik