Do Teenagers Suffer from a Form of Vampirism?

What teenager does not exhibit an extreme moodiness or have an easily irritated temperament such as the dark brooding figures we think of as vampires? Could it be, that laying through the day as if in a trance but feeling rejuvenated by the night air is not teen laziness but a form of Vampirism? How about the light sensitivity issues many teenagers have and fear of waking in the "early morning" hours before noon. My teenage vampire is absolutely eat up with that one.

My daughter has this growing form of Vampirism. She especially fears the unrelenting brightness and glow from the stark "morning" sun. I have tried on many occasions to convey assurance, to explain that the morning light will not ignite the soul. However, for a teenager who roams the night like a creature of the dark, this is a concept that cannot be grasped.

Oftentimes, when my vampire child does finally arise, she does not actually act human but more like someone inflicted. No one is safe from the sharply intense barbs or the demoralizing vampire glare that penetrates to the very soul.

It is not until the evening hours that life seems to course through her vampire like veins and some form of social behavior, although subtle, rears its head.

In the North American Edition, of the Encarta English Dictionary, one of the definitions for Vampirism given is "financial or emotional exploitation". They define this as "the act of preying on other people for financial or emotional gain". As a parent, I wonder...Is this not just what teenagers do?

I have on occasion posed the question to my vampire child about being out for my blood. Even if blood lettings are not used literally, any parent with a bank account knows these teenage vampires will bleed you dry there.

As a parent of two teenagers, I know the biggest mistake is to show weakness or all could be lost. Most teenagers would be on you like a pack of dogs if their vampire sharp senses pick up any weak links in the chain.

I have heard that this form of behavior or Vampirism heals in teens if given time. Maybe time truly is my friend and the cure to the daunting behavior of teenage Vampirism will be short and an end forthcoming as they mature.

My only advice to other parents when facing symptoms of Vampirism is to open your accounts and keep a low profile when they come to feed. Additionally, find alternate routes within your home so that you do not have to cross the caustic paths of those inflicted with Vampirism. You might think of purchasing a cage as well. Having a safe haven to climb into might be your only sanctuary for many grueling years to come.

Resources include:

http://encarta.msn.com/encnet/features/dictionary/DictionaryResults.aspx?refid=1861733584