DO U TLK N WRITE the WAY U TXT

Texting - it is the plague of the twenty first century writer; a virus that debilitates language. It has influenced our society so much that we are losing our ability to write without using at least a half dozen acronyms or word abbreviations. Okay, I must admit I do text on occasion; however, I'm an old school texter. I stick with the tried and true standbys like OMG, TTYL and LOL.

Nevertheless, I'm seeing more and more adults jumping or should I say creeping their way into the Text Obsessed Generation, or as I call it, TOG. There's nothing more entertaining than watching a parent or grandparent attempting to text their children or grandchildren, "HI RUOK HIT ME BAK TTYL MOFO!" Whoa old timer do you remotely know what those acronyms means! What next - grandmaws downloading apps for 50cent while grandpa rocks out his iPod to Lady GaGa! All of the above activities are things I do not wish to observe my parents or grandparent doing. The other involves green gelatin, shower caps and denture-cream - but I digress.

Some deem it is a lot cooler to speak in text, "OMG, RUOK or URAQT!" Texting may be a fast way to communicate but let's not use it a substitute for calling an old friend just to say hello, or a hand written note to ask how are you. There is a certain human sanctity in face to face socialization. The expression in someone's eyes when telling them congratulations or I'm sorry to hear about your loss. The one on one contact with a total stranger as you extend hand in fellowship. These qualities are what make us human.

Every generation had their trends that drive us crazy and texting is just one of them. I remember being reprimanded for having a transistor radio ear piece in my ear at the dinner table. I think there ought to be an app for humanity. Download it and you are instantly linked back to reality. It engages all other apps around you allowing for human interaction to take place. Don't worry it won't disable the Pizza Hut apps. I'll have extra pepperoni please. With all that being said Socializing - 101 is ready to begin. Let's get started:

1. Find the off button on your cell phone, use index finger hold down for 3 seconds this will turn it off.

2. Immediately place phone in pocket, purse, backpack, etc.

3. Turn to the bewildered person next to you, yes the one trying to find the off button, help them.

4. Now ask bewildered person their name, then tell them your name.

5. Look at their face, watch their lips move, this movement is called "Talking."

6. If they answer back this is considered, "A Conversation."

7. If you notice other bewildered people near you include them in the conversation.

8. This is called, "Socializing."

9. Ask bewildered people if they are hungry. Borrow diehard texter's cell phone and order a pizza. While you're at it make a long distance call to Guam. Services them right for not turning off their cell phone!

10. Now you have what's called a "Party!" Continue this course of action at least twice a week.

TYVM BFFS URDBEST CU L8TR.